Moral Jokes

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    Little johnny at school

    Hot 2 years ago

    One day at the end of class little Johnny's teacher has the class go home and think of a story and then conclude the moral of that story. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story, little Suzy raises her hand."My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Well, one Sunday we hit a big bump and all the eggs flew out of the basket and onto the road."The teacher asks for the moral of the story. Suzy replies, "Don't keep all your eggs in one basket."Next is little Lucy. "Well my dad owns a farm too and every weekend we take the chicken eggs and put them in the incubator. Last weekend only 8 of the 12 eggs hatched."The teacher asks for the moral of the story. Lucy replies "Don't count your eggs before they're hatched."Last is little Johnny. "My uncle Ted fought in the Vietnam war; his plane was shot down over enemy territory. He more...

    Three mullahs were taken to heaven after their death. God told them, " What ever you ever need is here. Do not desire any thing more. If you do, the same moment you will disappear from here and go to hell." Every thing was fine a year. Then one day a mullah felt like trimming his beard. Hardly he expressed this to his friends and in a flash he was thrown into hell. So mullah number two and three were extra causious and remained in heaven for two years. Then one day the second mullah saw a dinar on the road. He could not resist the temptation and so he bent to pick it up. In a flash, the third mullah who was just behind him, disappeared and was thrown into hell.

    Here is a moral question for you. This is an imaginary situation, but it may be interesting deciding what you would do.
    The situation: You are in the Midwest, and there is a huge flood in progress. Many homes have been lost, water supplies compromised, and infrastructure destroyed. Let's say you're a photographer out getting still photos for a news service, traveling alone, looking for particularly poignant scenes. If you were to stumble across Bill Clinton struggling to keep from being swept away in a raging river and you had a choice of rescuing him or getting a Pulitzer prize-winning photograph of the death of a President, what shutter speed would you use?

    Here's the first installment of politically correct TV shows coming up in the fall TV season, complete with ratings supplied by Big Brother (offensive to the politically correct):
    Sunday night:
    "Mystery, She Wrote":
    Cabot Cove is engulfed by a wave of anonymous charitable gifts. The mayor asks Jessica to investigate so the donors can be honored in a public ceremony. Ratings: S/MU, ALG.
    [See ratings at the end of this listing.]
    "The Sunday Night Movie: Blowing Up in Beverly Hills":
    A made-for-TV movie based on an actual event. After two troubled siblings (real-life brothers Emilio Estevez and Charlie Sheen) contemplate murdering their wealthy but insensitive parents, they decide instead to go to court. While attending mandatory therapy, the family explores and heals deep-seated conflicts. Inspired by the trial of Lyle and Erik Menendez. Dr. Goodfellow: Alan Alda. First of two parts. Ratings: S/MU, VATCOT, RPSE.
    "Married... Happily more...

    Here's the next installment of politically correct TV shows coming up in the fall TV season, complete with ratings supplied by Big Brother (offensive to the politically correct, the differently abled, Bill Clinton and his fans, and liberal apologists):
    Thursday night's programs:
    "The Simpsons":
    For his Eagle Scout community service project, Bart develops a workable plan to convert Springfield's nuclear power plant into a solar facility.
    Guest voice: Vice President Al Gore.
    Ratings: S/MU, WW, RPSE.
    "American Playhouse: Young Mr. Clinton":
    In a performance entitled "Doobie-ous Battle", while protesting the Vietnam War in England, Bill smokes marijuana without inhaling. Part 12 of 15.
    Next week: "To Russia with Love."
    Ratings: S/MU, ISS, PCMM.
    "L.A. Law":
    Douglas finally signs on to a plan to turn McKenzie-Brackman into a non-profit legal defense clinic. Stuart realizes the political more...

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