Moose Jokes / Recent Jokes
Adrian: I'll never go moose hunting again.Duane: Why? Was the gun too heavy? Adrian: I didn't mind carrying the big gun, but the 200-pound decoy was a real drag.
• A law in Fairbanks does not allow moose to have sex on city streets.
• Even though it is legal to hunt a bear, it is illegal to wake a bear for photo opportunities.
(is shooting waking?)
• Fairbanks: It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.
• In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone's ear while they are moose hunting.
• It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.
(How did the moose get in the flippin plane?)
• Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time.
• Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
• State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found to exist.
(*911* "we are sorry, this number has been disconnected")
Every winter, two hunters went moose hunting but never had any success. Finally, they felt they had come up with a foolproof plan. They obtained an authentic looking female moose costume and learned the mating call of a female moose.
Their plan was to put on the costume, lure the bull, then get out of the costume and shoot it. They set themselves up at the edge of a clearing, got in the costume and began giving the moose love call.
Before they knew it, their call had been answered and a bull came crashing out of the forest, straight into the clearing. As soon as the bull got close enough, the fellow in the front said, "Now! Let's get out and get him."
After a moment that seemed to last forever, the fellow in the back shouted, "Damn, the zipper's stuck. What do we do now?"
"I'm going to start nibbling the grass," the fellow in front replied, "but you'd better brace yourself!"
How can a bar tender know which customers like Moose Head?
They're the ones with ankle marks around their hips
In Fairbanks it is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose. While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited. It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. It is the state policy that emergencies are held to a minimum and are rarely found to exist.-Sec. 44.62.270. State policy. Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.
Moose you be so nosy!
There are two moose hunters who hop
on a float-plane and fly to their
destination. When the plane arrives at the
lake, the pilot says: "In three days, I'll
meet you two guys back here with one
moose." The plane flew away and the
men set up camp.
The first day they shot nothing. The
second, one man shot a moose and on
the third day, the second man shot
another moose. The plane came to pick
them up, and the pilot said: "What are you
doing, I told you to be here with only one
moose, not two." The hunters told the
pilot that last year, the pilot let them take
two mooses (mice?). The pilot wanted to
stay competitive with the other pilots and
made an exception this time to let the
hunters take two mooses. With the extra
weight, the plane barely got off the lake,
then hit a tree and crashed. One hunter
crawled over to his buddy to see if he was
hurt. He shook him, then he woke up more...