Mercy Jokes / Recent Jokes

Mr. Smith was brought to Mercy Hospital (a Catholic hospital), and taken quickly in for coronary surgery. The operation went well and, as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of Mercy, who was waiting by his bed. "Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," said the nun, gently patting his hand. "We do need to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?" "No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely. "Then can you pay in cash?" persisted the nun. "I'm afraid I cannot, Sister." "Well, do you have any close relatives?" the nun questioned sternly. "Just my sister in New Mexico," he volunteered. "But she's a humble spinster nun." "Oh, I must correct you, Mr. Smith. Nuns are not spinsters - they are married to God." "Wonderful," said Mr. Smith. "In that case, please send the bill to my brother-in -law."

A pastor was giving a lesson to a group of children on the 23rd Psalm. He noticed that one of the little boys seemed disquieted by the phrase "Surely, goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life..." "What's wrong with that, Johnny?" the pastor asked.

"Well," answered Johnny, "I understand about having goodness and mercy, for God is good. But I'm not sure I'd like Shirley following me around all the time."

A man was brought to Mercy Hospital, and went in for coronary surgery. The operation went well, and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of Mercy waiting by his bed.
"Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," the nun said while patting his hand. "We do have to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?"
"No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely.
"Can you pay in cash?"
"I'm afraid I can't, Sister."
"Do you have any close relatives, then?"
"Just my sister in New Mexico," replied, "but she's a spinster nun."
"Nuns are not spinsters, Mr. Smith," the nun replied. "They are married to God."
"Okay," the man said with a smile, "then bill my brother-in-law."

A man was brought to Mercy Hospital, and went in for coronary surgery. The operation went well, and as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a Sister of Mercy waiting by his bed. "Mr. Smith, you're going to be just fine," the nun said while patting his hand. "We do have to know, however, how you intend to pay for your stay here. Are you covered by insurance?""No, I'm not," the man whispered hoarsely."Can you pay in cash?""I'm afraid I can't, Sister." "Do you have any close relatives, then?""Just my sister in New Mexico," replied, "but she's a spinster nun.""Nuns are not spinsters, Mr. Smith," the nun replied. "They are married to God.""Okay," the man said with a smile, "then bill my brother-in-law."

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway, when he notices
a sign out of the corner of his eye. It says, "SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE
OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES." He thinks it was just a figment of his
imagination and drives on without a second thought. Soon, he sees
another sign which says, "SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5
MILES," and realizes that these signs are for real. When he drives
past a third sign saying, "SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT
RIGHT," his curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the
drive.
On the far side of the parking lot is a somber stone building with a
small sign next to the door reading, "SISTERS OF MERCY." He climbs the
steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black
habit who asks, "What may we do for you, my son?" He answers, "I saw your
signs along the highway, and was interested in possibly more...

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway, when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye. It reads SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION - 10 MILES.
He thinks it is just a figment of his imagination and drives on without a second thought. Soon, he sees another sign which says SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION - 5 MILES and realizes that these signs are for real.
When he drives past a third sign saying SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT RIGHT, his curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive.
On the far side of the parking lot is a somber stone building with a sign next to the door reading SISTERS OF MERCY. He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a beautiful nun in a black habit who says, "I know what you are here for, my son. Please follow me."
He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door, and tells the man, "Please knock on this more...

A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway, when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye. It says SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES.
He thinks it was just a figment of his imagination and drives on without a second thought. Soon, he sees another sign which says SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5 MILES and realizes that these signs are for real.
When he drives past a third sign saying SISTERS OF MERCY HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT RIGHT, his curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive.
On the far side of the parking lot is a somber stone building with a small sign next to the door reading SISTERS OF MERCY. He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks "What may we do for you, my son?"
He answers "I saw your signs along the highway, and was interested in possibly doing business."
"Very well, my son. Please follow me."
He is led more...