Lisp Jokes

So there was this guy named Mung, right. He was a pretty miserable guy to start out with. Kids at school made fun of him, his mom made fun of him, even his dog wouldn't play with him. But there was some luck. One day, he met this girl who he thought was perfect for him. She was made fun of at school, too. because she had a lisp. But when he approached her, she spurned him. This upset him greatly. Even some girl who nobody liked didn't even like him. He was so upset that he decided to go jump off the local bridge. As he stood at the edge, thinking about his miserable life, the girl saw him standing there. In a last minute attempt to save a life, she shouted out, "Dun' go, Mung!" (Korean translation:' Butthole.") It was the last straw for poor Mung who plunged into the rive

Giving up on assembly language was the apple in our Garden of Eden: Languages whose use squanders machine cycles are sinful. The LISP machine now permits LISP programmers to abandon bra and fig-leaf.

A LISP programmer knows the value of everything, but the cost of nothing.

One day, a guy that had a lisp decided to walk down the street. His name was Harry!
He walks into the bakery, looks around and says to the lady behind the counter "Can I please have that bum!" the lady behind the counters says "You mean bun!" Harry replies "Yeh!" he gets his bun and then walks into the Hardware shop next door. he has a look around and gets something then walks up to the counter and says "Can I please buy this fuck it!" the shopkeeper replies "You mean bucket!" Harry answers "Yeh!" he gets his bucket and then walks down the street a bit more.
He gets to the petshop and sees a dog left by itself in the window. He feels sorry for it so he walks up to the counter in the pet shop and says "Can I please have that cock and spank it!" the shopkeeper replies" You mean cocker spaniel!" Harry answers "Yeh!"He gets the cocker spaniel and is walking home when he drops his bun and more...