Lettuce Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Planting the Lettuce

    Hot 2 years ago

    A prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife:

    "Dear Husband, I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?"

    The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read all mail, replied in a letter:

    "Dear Wife, whatever you do, do not touch the back garden. That is where I hid all the money."

    A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife:

    "Dear Husband, You wouldn't believe what happened, some men came with shovels to the house, and dug up all the back garden."

    The prisoner wrote another letter back:

    "Dear wife, now is the best time to plant the lettuce."

    A
    prisoner in jail receives a letter from his wife: "Dear
    Husband, I have decided to plant some lettuce in the
    back garden. When is the best time to plant them?"
    The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read
    all mail, replied in a letter: "Dear Wife, whatever
    you do, do not touch the back garden. That is where
    I hid all the money."
    A week or so later, he received another letter from
    his wife: "Dear Husband, You wouldn't believe
    what happened, some men came with shovels to the house,
    and dug up the entire back garden."
    The prisoner wrote another letter back: "Dear
    wife, now is the best time to plant the lettuce."

    Laboratory Rabbit Freedom A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up. As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life. 'Wow, this is great,' he thought. It wasn't long before he came to a hedge and, after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass. 'Hey,' he called. 'I'm a rabbit from the laboratory and I've just escaped. Are you wild rabbits? 'Yes. Come and join us,' they cried. Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good. 'What else do you wild rabbits do?' he asked. 'Well,' one of them said. 'You see that field there? It's got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them.' This, he couldn't resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful. Later, he asked them again, 'What else do more...

    Working in the garden

    Hot 6 years ago

    A prisioner in jail received a letter from his wife:
    "I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?"
    The prisioner, knowing that the prison guards read all the mail, replied in a letter:
    "Dear Wife, whatever you do, DO NOT touch the back garden! That is where I hid all the gold."
    A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife:
    "You wouldn't believe what happened. Some men came with shovels to the house, and dug up the whole back garden."
    The prisoner wrote another letter:
    "Dear wife, NOW is the best time to plant the lettuce!"

    Working in the garden

    Hot 6 years ago

    A prisioner in jail received a letter from his wife: "I have decided to plant some lettuce in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?" The prisioner, knowing that the prison guards read all the mail, replied in a letter: "Dear Wife, whatever you do, DO NOT touch the back garden! That is where I hid all the gold." A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife: "You wouldn't believe what happened. Some men came with shovels to the house, and dug up the whole back garden." The prisoner wrote another letter: "Dear wife, NOW is the best time to plant the lettuce!"

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