Leaning Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The Leaning Tower of Pisa

    Hot 11 months ago

    A blonde and a brunette jump off of the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Who lands first?

    Once upon a time there was an elderly gentleman that was suffering from Alzheimer's. His wife of 40 years loved him very much, but she couldn't handle him any longer. He would wander about never knowing where he was or sometimes even who he was. She took him to a nursing home.
    At the nursing home, while the wife was filling out paperwork, a nurse had the gentleman sit in a chair.
    Suddenly the man starting slowly leaning to hisleft. The nurse ran over and put a pillow on his left side to prop him up.
    A few minutes later, he started leaning to his right. Again, the nurse ran over and put a pillow on his right side.
    Then he started leaning forward. This time, the nurse strapped him into the chair.
    About this time, his wife, having completed the paperwork, walked up to him and asked, "How do you like the place?"
    "It's okay," he said. "But, they won't let me fart."

    Once upon a time there was an elderly gentleman who was suffering from Alzheimer's. His wife of 40 years loved him very much, but she couldn't handle him any longer. He would wander about never knowing where he was or sometimes even who he was. She took him to a nursing home.
    At the nursing home, while the wife was filling out paperwork, a nurse had the gentleman sit in a chair. Suddenly the man starting slowly leaning to his left. The nurse ran over and put a pillow on his left side to prop him up.
    A few minutes later, he started leaning to his right.
    Again, the nurse ran over and put a pillow on his right side.
    Then he starting leaning forward.
    This time, the nurse strapped him into the chair.
    About this time, his wife, having completed the paperwork, walked up to him and asked, "How do you like the place?"
    "It's okay," he said. "But, they won't let me fart!"

    Once upon a time there was an elderly gentleman who was suffering from Alzheimer's. His wife of 40 years loved him very much, but she couldn't handle him any longer. He would wander about never knowing where he was or sometimes even who he was. She took him to a nursing home.At the nursing home, while the wife was filling out paperwork, a nurse had the gentleman sit in a chair. Suddenly the man starting slowly leaning to his left. The nurse ran over and put a pillow on his left side to prop him up.A few minutes later, he started leaning to his right.Again, the nurse ran over and put a pillow on his right side.Then he starting leaning forward.This time, the nurse strapped him into the chair. About this time, his wife, having completed the paperwork, walked up to him and asked, "How do you like the place?""It's okay," he said. "But, they won't let me fart!"

    One night a man decides to visit his local bar. He takes a seat and orders a beer. After polishing off his beer, he beckons the bartender over and says, "Betcha $20 I can bite my eye." The bartender scoffs and accepts. The man then calmly removes his false eye and bites it. The bartender grudgingly forks over a twenty.
    Later that night, after a few more beers, the man wanders back to the bar and says rather drunkenly, "Hey barkeep, betcha another $20 I can bite my other eye." Wanting to win back his money and seriously doubtful that the man has two false eyes, the bartender accepts. The man calmly removes his false teeth and bites his other eye. Scowling, the bartender hands over another twenty. The man leaves and wanders around the bar as he drinks a few more beers.
    He strolls back over to the bar, leaning on it, again and calls the bartender, "Hey, barkeep," he burbles, "I'll give you a chance to win yer money back plus. Betcha $100 if you more...

  • Recent Activity