Leadership Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people. He asks how she knows if they're intelligent.
    "I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen."Allow me to demonstrate."
    She phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?"
    Tony Blair responds, "It

    Leadership is the ability to get men to do what they don't want to do and like it.

    A husband and wife watched TV news: the cleanup at the World Trade Center and Pentagon; the videos of different countries around the world; crying with Americans over the events of the past few weeks; reporters updating and attempting to analyze political strategy; President Bush making speeches; the country coming together united; the decisive action President Bush is taking.

    The wife turns to the husband and says, "I'm so thankful that George W. Bush is our President. He is doing such a wonderful job and showing a lot of character and strong leadership."

    The husband turns to the wife and says, "Oh, shut up, Tipper."

    Leadership is an opportunity to serve. It is not a trumpet call to self importance.

    As a result of DOD budget cutbacks, we are forced to reduce the size of the force. Under CRAP, older soldiers will go on early retirement, thus permitting the retention of lower paid soldiers who represent the Army's future.
    A program to phase out older soldiers via retirement by the end of the current fiscal year will be placed in effect. the program will be known as Retire Active Personnel Early (RAPE).
    Employees who are RAPEd will be given the opportunity to seek civilian employment within the Department of the Army. To that end, RAPEd soldiers will be required to fill out numerous DA Forms (currently in the development, test, and evaluation stage) detailing their education and experience.
    This phase does not guarantee retired soldiers a civil service position; it does, however, guarantee that the soldier's unique capabilities will be considered before being bypassed in the hiring process. This phase of CRAP is known as Survey of Capabilities of Retired Warriors more...

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