Las Vegas Jokes

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    Forbes latest list of the 400 richest Americans puts Las Vegas Sands CEO, Sheldon Adelson, at number three, worth $20.5 billion. Forbes reports that last year the casino mogul made $1 million per hour. Sadly, he was paid in buckets of nickels.

    According to the Associated Press, "Many people from other countries are flocking to the United States, to Las Vegas in most cases, to choose the sex of their babies. Well-off foreign couples are getting around laws banning sex selection in their home countries by coming to American soil, where it's legal, for medical procedures that can give them a boy or girl, if they want". The Chinese want boys, the Canadians want girls, and the Israelis want to win big.

    Las Vegas has announced a new crackdown on homeless people in the city.
    Basically, they want you to leave after you lose all your stuff.

    Las Vegas's Bellagio hotel hosted its annual Pole-a-palooza competition, awarding a $10,000 first prize for the best shimmy-down performer. The event was affectionally called a "beat assignment" by journalists and patrons alike.

    Nevada’s governor’s race took a scandalous turn this week when a cocktail waitress accused a candidate, Rep. Jim Gibbons, of trying to sexually assault her in a parking garage in Las Vegas.
    Gibbons responded immediately by announcing he was gay, abused as a child and an alcoholic. When that didn’t work, he accused the waitress of harboring weapons of mass destruction.

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