Kitten Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    q:what do u call a kitten drinkin lemonade?????

    a: A sourpuss

    In a great romance, each person plays a part the other really likes. - Elizabeth AshleyMany a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success. - Jim BackusNo man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. - Honore de BalzacHoneymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting. - Ray BandyMarriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. - BaskinsI feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting. - Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hall of Fame InductionsLove: a temporary insanity often curable by marriage. - Ambrose BierceThe world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity. - Ambrose BierceI recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. - David BissonetteAh Mozart! He was happily married more...

    Two ROBINS were lying on their backs, BASKING in the sun. A mama cat and her kitten were walking by. The kitten complained,' Mama, I'm sooo hungry, what can we eat?' To which the mama cat, spying the two robins, replied,

    How about some Baskin Robbins?'

    In front of a delicatessen, an art connoisseur noticed a mangy little kitten lapping up milk from a saucer. The saucer, he realized with a start, was a rare and precious piece of pottery.
    He strolled into the store and offered two dollars for the cat. "It's not for sale," said the proprietor.
    "Look," said the collector, "that cat is dirty and undesirable, but I'm eccentric. I like cats that way. I'll raise my offer to ten dollars."
    "It's a deal," said the proprietor, and pocketed the ten on the spot.
    "For that sum I'm sure you won't mind throwing in the saucer," said the connoisseur. "The kitten seems so happy drinking from it."
    "Nothing doing," said the proprietor firmly. "That's my lucky saucer. From that saucer, so far this week I've sold 34 cats."

    In a great romance, each person plays a part the other really likes. - Elizabeth Ashley
    Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success. - Jim Backus
    No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman. - Honore de Balzac
    Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting. - Ray Bandy
    Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it. - Baskins
    I feel like Zsa Zsa Gabor's sixth husband. I know what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know how to make it interesting. - Milton Berle, when called to the microphone at the 2nd Annual Comedians Hall of Fame Inductions
    Love: a temporary insanity often curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce
    The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity. - Ambrose Bierce
    I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. - more...

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