Kipper Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon! Where do little fishes go every morning? To plaice school! What fish goes up the river at 100mph? A motor pike! How could the dolphin afford to buy a house? He prawned everything! 1st kipper:' Smoking's bad for you' 2nd kipper:' It's OK, I've been cured' What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather? Skate! What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbours? A hermit crab! What do you get from a bad-tempered shark? As far away as possible! Why did the whale cross the road? To get to the other tide!

    Knock Knock
    Who's there?
    Kipper!
    Kipper who?
    Kipper hands to yourself!

    Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon! Where do little fishes go every morning? To plaice school! What fish goes up the river at 100mph? A motor pike! How could the dolphin afford to buy a house? He prawned everything! 1st kipper: 'Smoking's bad for you' 2nd kipper: 'It's OK, I've been cured' What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather? Skate! What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbours? A hermit crab! What do you get from a bad-tempered shark? As far away as possible! Why did the whale cross the road? To get to the other tide!

    Knock Knock
    Who's there?
    Kipper!
    Kipper who?
    Kipper hands to yourself!

    Which fish can perform operations?
    A Sturgeon!

    Where do little fishes go every morning?
    To plaice school!

    What fish goes up the river at 100mph?
    A motor pike!

    How could the dolphin afford to buy a house?
    He prawned everything!

    1st kipper: `Smoking`s bad for you`
    2nd kipper: `It`s OK, I`ve been cured`

    What kind of fish is useful in freezing weather?
    Skate!

    What do you call a fish with no eyes?
    Fsh!

    What lives in the ocean, is grouchy and hates neighbors?
    A hermit crab!

    What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?
    As far away as possible!

    Why did the whale cross the road?
    To get to the other tide! Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
    To the prawn broker!

    What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can`t refuse?
    The Codfather!

    What happened to the shark that swallowed a bunch of keys?
    He got more...

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