There was a little guy sitting at a bar drinking a beer. A while later a huge guy walked into the bar and he went up to the little guy and karate chopped him in the back. The little guy fell off his bar stool and when he got up the big guy said, ''That was a karate chop from Korea.''
The big guy went to the restroom and the little guy ordered himself another beer. About 20 minutes later the big guy came back and karate choped the little guy in the back again. The little guy got up and dusted himself off and the big guy told him,''That was a karate chop from China.''
The little guy got up and decided he wasn't going to take any more of this, so he left the bar. About an hour later the little guy comes back to the bar and he hits the big guy in the back. The big guy is knocked out cold and he's on the floor. The little guy tells the bartender, ''Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears!''
After three of their neighbors' home had been robbed, a young couple decided to get a guard dog.
The young wife went to the pet store and told the clerk she wanted a good guard dog. "I'm sorry, we're all sold out," the clerk said. "All we have left is this little Scottie dog. He does know karate though."
The wife didn't believe him, so he said to the dog, "Karate that chair!" The dog went to the chair and broke it into pieces. Then, he said to the dog, "Karate that table!" The dog went to the table and broke it in half.
Impressed, the wife bought the dog and took it home to her husband who was expecting a large guard dog. The husband took one look at the dog and was immediately very skeptical about its abilities as a guard dog. The wife then told her husband that the dog knew karate.
"Karate my ass!" replied the husband.
To this day, he remains in hospital.
Blonde Joe was a handsome young man, but definitely not the brightest guy around. Each day when he walked home from work, he would get stopped by three nasty men and they would beat him up and steal his money.
Finally, Joe decided it would be in his best interest to walk a different route, but it would also be wise to take some self-defense classes so this wouldn't happen again.
He joined a karate class and soon was doing very well with it.
One day, on his way home from work, Joe confidently decided to take his old route home and, sure enough, there were the same three thugs. He walked up to them and the battle began.
The next afternoon, Joe went to his karate class with a black eye, a broken nose and a busted lip.
His instructor was shocked and asked him what had happened.
"Well," Joe explained, "I took my old way home last night so I could beat those guys up who used to steal my money."
"So what happened?" asked his more...
Q: What do you call a pig that does karate?
Joe was a not too smart kind of guy. Everyday when he walked home from work, he would get stopped by three nasty men and they would beat him up and steal his money.
Finally, Joe decided that it would serve his best interest to walk a different route and then take up some self-defense classes so this wouldn't happen again. He joined a karate class and soon was doing very well to defend himself.
So, one day, on the way home from work Joe took his old route home and sure enough there they were. He walked up to them and the battle ensued. The next afternoon Joe went to his karate class with a black eye, a broken nose and a busted lip.
His instructor, shocked, asked him what happened.
"Well," explained Joe, "I took my old way home last night so I could beat these guys up who were stealing my money, but they beat me up before I could get my shoes and socks off!"