Jagger Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. So he says, "Hello, Patricia Whack. I'd like to get a loan to buy a boat and go on a long vacation."
    Patti looks at this frog in disbelief and asks how much he wants to borrow.
    The frog says $30,000 and the teller asks him his name, and the frog says it's Kermit Jagger, he's the adopted pet of Mick Jagger and that it's ok, he knows the bank manager.
    Patti explains that $30,000 is a substantial amount of money and that he will need to secure some collateral against the loan. She asks if he has anything that he can use as collateral. The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny pink porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
    Very confused, Patti explains that she'll have to consult with the manager and leaves the room. She finds the manager and says, "There is a frog called Kermit Jagger out more...

    What's the difference between an English Sheepherder and Mick Jagger? Mick Jagger sings "Hey, Hey, you, you, get off of my cloud." An English sheepherder says: "Hey, Hey MacCloud! Get off of my ewe!"

    A frog walks into his local bank and walks up to the counter." I would like a loan of £30, 000 please." he asks the clerk, whose name is Patrick Whack. "Thirty thousand pounds? That's a lot of money, you know." says Paddy, "You'll need a collateral for that amount of money." "That's okay," says the frog, "I have this." And he pulls out of his pocket a tiny pink ceramic elephant. "What's this? I can't accept this as collateral." "Don't worry," says the frog, "I know the manager, he's a good friend of mine. Tell him his friend Kermit Jagger is here." Paddy gets up from his chair and goes to the manager's office, taking the little pink elephant with him. He shows it to the manager and says "There's a frog out there says he knows you, his name is Kermit Jagger. He want to borrow £30, 000... he gave this as collateral... what on earth is it?" The manager takes the little elephant, studies it for a more...

    Knock Knock
    Who's there!
    Jagger!
    Jagger who!
    Jagger'd edge!

    What is the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottsman?
    - Mick Jagger says, "Hey you, get off of my cloud." and a Scottsman says,
    "Hey McCloud get off of my ewe."

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