Interns Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Greetings prospective White House interns!
    This year, our program is heading into its 69th year of bringing America's best and brightest to the Nation's Capitol to help the "Head Man" do his job. We expect that 1998 will be the most exciting one yet!
    Why, you might be asking yourself, do I want to be a part of this demanding, yet rewarding program? Check this out:
    * Be a part of the action in the pulsing, throbbing political scene of the hottest city in the world!
    * Get up close and personal with some of America's movers and shakers!
    * See rooms in the White House that even a VIP tour won't show you!
    * Get total access to plenty of sensitive Presidential activities!
    Sounds like it's for you? Just listen to this testimonial from a former intern:
    "I couldn't believe it! After only a few months on the job answering phones and fetching coffee, there I was, debriefing the president. Getting involved in executive branch affairs is just more...

    (Be read when using the Willy voice in your head)

    SUBJ: Clinton's Address to the Nation

    Text from Clinton's Address to the Nation if he were on truth serum.
    10. 16 P. m. ET (0216 GMT) August 17, 1998

    Good evening.

    This afternoon in this room, from this chair, in this very spot, I was forced to testify before the Office of Independent Counsel and the grand jury.

    I answered their questions truthfully whenever there was compelling physical evidence that would contradict my lies, including questions about having sex while watching an intern do kinky things that I now spin as being part of my private life, questions so embarrassing that no American citizen would ever want to answer.

    Still, the polls indicate that I must take complete responsibility for all my actions, both public and private. And that is why I am speaking to you tonight and not ducking questions while the Marine Band plays loudly and drowns out the more...

    Grandma Jones from the valley had never experienced a sick day in her life, so she didn't take it kindly when a bad case of the mulligrubs sent her to the hospital for observation.
    By the time a pair of husky interns got Grandma tucked into bed, she had managed to complain about everything: the temperature, the lights, the skimpy gown, the food and the mattress, especially, the mattress.
    Suddenly, Grandma spotted a small plastic item with a button, attached to a cord. "What's that?" she demanded.
    "If you need anything in the middle of the night, Grandma," said one of the interns, "just press that button."
    "What does it do, ring a bell?" she asked.
    "No, it turns on a light in the hall for the nurse on duty," the intern replied.
    "A light in the hall?" responded Grandma. "Look, I'm the sick one around here. If the night nurse needs a light on in the hall, she can get up and switch it on herself."

    Greetings prospective White House interns! This year, our program is heading into its 69th year of bringing America's best and brightest to the Nation's Capitol to help the "Head Man" do his job. We expect that 1998 will be the most exciting one yet! Why, you might be asking yourself, do I want to be a part of this demanding, yet rewarding program? Check this out: * Be a part of the action in the pulsing, throbbing political scene of the hottest city in the world! * Get up close and personal with some of America's movers and shakers! * See rooms in the White House that even a VIP tour won't show you! * Get total access to plenty of sensitive Presidential activities! Sound like it's for you? Just listen to this testimonial from a former intern: "I couldn't believe it! After only a few months on the job answering phones and fetching coffee, there I was, debriefing the president....Getting involved in executive branch affairs is just fantastic."- M. Lewinsky, Beverly more...

    In The News - Edited excerpts from the LA Times
    Includes some late night humor
    WARNING: May be offensive to American Politicians, White House interns, Amtrak, American sports stars, and supermodels.
    Well folks, the rain is on hold for a few days, but... Legislators in Sacramento voted to change the state song from "I Love You California" to Paul Simon's "Slip Slidin' Away".
    President Clinton says he approaches everything Saddam Hussein says with a great degree of skepticism. Pretty much the same way we approach everything Clinton says. (Letterman)
    American forces in the Persian Gulf went back to full alert when Hussein announced he would honor his latest UN inspection agreement as faithfully as Clinton honored his wedding vows.
    Newsweek magazine says Monica Lewensky's resume lists one of her duties at the White House as training the new interns. That's not surprising. If you were Bill Clinton, wouldn't YOU want her to train the new intern? more...

  • Recent Activity