Intention Jokes / Recent Jokes

How does a man take a bubble bath?
He eats beans for dinner.
Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up?
Because they don't have testicles.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
Why don't men eat more M&M's?
They're too hard to peel.
What do you call a man with an IQ of 50?
Gifted.
What's a man's idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.
How can you tell if a man is sexually excited?
He's breathing.
What do men and bottles of beer have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up.
How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who cares!!!
What is the thinnest book in the world?
What Men Know About Women
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. Men will screw anything!
How do you save a man from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
We don't know - it's never happened.
Why do more...

How does a man take a bubble bath? He eats beans for dinner.Why do women rub their eyes when they wake up? Because they don't have testicles.Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don't have eyes.Why don't men eat more M&M's? They're too hard to peel.What do you call a man with an IQ of 50? Gifted.What's a man's idea of foreplay? A half hour of begging.How can you tell if a man is sexually excited? He's breathing.What do men and bottles of beer have in common? They're both empty from the neck up.How can you tell if a man is happy? Who cares!!! What is the thinnest book in the world? What Men Know About WomenHow many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Men will screw anything! How do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head.How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know - it's never happened.Why do men always have a stupid look on their faces? Because they're stupid.How are men and parking spots alike? The good more...

What's the best form of birth control after 50? Nudity What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? 45 lbs. What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? 45 minutes. What's the fastest way to a man's heart? Through his chest with a sharp knife. Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good looking? Because those men already have boyfriends. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever. Why does the bride always wear white? Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator. How do you know when you're really ugly? Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed. How do you know when you're leading a more...

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? -

Well, it's the same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving

Q. How do you Scare a Man? A. Sneak up behind him and start throwing rice. Q. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? A. The same urge that makes dogs chase cars that they have no intention of driving. Q. What do you do with a man who thinks he's God's gift to women? A. Exchange him. Q. What's a man's idea of a perfect date? A. A woman who answers the door stark naked holding a six pack. Q. Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating? A. To stop the snoring before it starts. Q. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A. After a year, the dog is still excited to see you. Q. How do you get a man to exercise? A. Tie the TV remote control to his shoelaces. Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? A. We don't know. It's never happened. Q. Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years? A. Because, even back then men wouldn't stop to ask for directions. Q. What is a man's idea of safe sex? A. A padded headboard. more...

Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Hanukkah will merge.
An industry source said that the deal had been in the works about 1300 years.
While details were not available at press time, it is believed that theoverhead cost of having twelve days of Christmas and eight days of Hanukkah was becoming prohibitive for both sides.
By combining forces, we're told, the world will be able to enjoy consistently high-quality service during the Fifteen Days of Chrismukah, as the new holiday is being called.
Massive layoffs are expected, with lords a-leaping and maids a-milkingbeing the hardest hit.
As part of the conditions of the agreement, the letters on the dreydl, currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming unintelligible to a wider audience.
Also, instead of translating to "A great miracle happened there," the message on the dreydl will be the more...

Q. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
A. The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of
driving.