Hostess Jokes

A minister was asked to dinner by one of his flock who had a reputation for being a crummy housekeeper. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life. "Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, "They're as clean as soap and water could get them". He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and started eating. It was really delicious and he said so, despite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and shouted, "Here Soap! Here Water!"

When my wife and I showed up at a very popular restaurant, it was crowded. My wife went up to the hostess (who was blonde) and asked, "Will it be long?"
The hostess, ignoring her, kept on writing in her book. My wife again asked "How much of a wait?"
The blonde looked up, "About ten minutes."
A short time later, the blonde got on the loudspeaker, and announced "Willette B. Long, your table is ready."

There was this Russian guy, this Spanish guy and this Korean guy all in the same ESL class. The teacher told them to make a sentence using the word' hostess' for homework. So the next day the Russian guy goes "Oh I have a good sentence. The hostess was very courteous." And the teacher said "Wow that was really good!" The Spanish guy goes, "Oh I have a better sentence. My mother is a good hostess when others come over." Then the teacher said, "Wow that was really good!" Finally the Korean guy goes, "I have the best sentence. When my mother answers the phone, she says hostess?"

A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners.

When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were
the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life.

"Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime.

She replied, "Of course they were cleaned Father."
"They're as clean as soap and water could get them."

He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and they all started eating. The meal was delicious and he paid his compliments in spite the dirty dishes.

When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and yells -
"Here Soap! Here Water!"

A priest was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes werethe dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life." Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime. She replied, "Of course they were cleaned Father." "They're as clean as soap and water could get them." He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and they all started eating. The meal was delicious and he paid his compliments in spite the dirty dishes. When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and yells -"Here Soap! Here Water!"