Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again
A Chinese man arranges for a hooker to come to his room for the
evening. Once in the room they undress, climb into bed, and go at
When finished, the Chinese man jumps up, runs over to the window,
takes deep breath, dives under the bed, climbs out the other side,
jumps back into bed with the hooker and commences to repeat the
The hooker is impressed with the gusto of the second encounter. When
finished, the Chinese man jumps up, runs over to the window, takes a
deep breath, dives under the bed, climbs out the other side, jumps
back into bed with the hooker and starts again.
The hooker is amazed as this sequence is repeated four times. During
the fifth encore, she decides to try it herself.
So when they are done she jumps up, goes to the window and takes a
deep breath of fresh air, dives under the bed...and finds four
A guy in the navy is out on leave. He realizes that he has an hour left. He really wants to get a piece of ass before he goes back, so he runs to the nearest whore-house and procures himself a hooker. He goes up into her room and doesn't mess around, pulling his pants down and jumping on for the ride.
He starts humping her and he notices that every time he humps, her toes curl up! He figures he must be pretty good in the sack if can get a hooker's toes to curl.
He comes back the next day and asks for the same hooker. He goes a little bit earlier so he can talk to her and take his time. He goes up to the room and they both undress. Before getting in bed, the sailor says: "I got the impression that you were impressed with my love-making yesterday."
The hooker replies: "Oh? Why's that?" He says,"I noticed every time I humped you, your toes would curl up!" The Hooker says: "For your information, sailor-boy, that's what happens when you don't more...
A guy is walking along the strip in Las Vegas and a knockout hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the hooker, "How much?"
Hooker replies, "It starts at $500 for a hand-job."
Guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job? No hand-job is worth that kind of money!"
The hooker says, "Do you see that Denny's on the corner?"
"Do you see the Denny's about a block further down?"
"And beyond that, do you see that third Denny's?"
"Well," says the hooker, smiling invitingly, "I own those. And, I own them because I give a hand-job that's worth $500."
Guy says, "What the hell? I'll give it a try."
They retire to a nearby motel. A short time later, the guy is sitting on the bed realizing that he just experienced the hand-job of a lifetime worth every bit of $500. He is so amazed, he more...
A guy went to Las Vegas, and won big, really big, in one of the casinos.
When you win big in Vegas the casino will give you free things, like meals, show tickets, or rooms, this is all designed to keep you there so that you will lose what money you have won.
After winning fifty thousand dollars at the crap table, the casino decided to give the guy a night in the penthouse suite.
The guy went up to the room, opened the big double doors, and stepped into a three room suite.
The room is on a corner of the hotel and two walls are nothing but windows, with a fantastic view of the city. There's a wet bar in one corner, with a big screen T.V.
The guy dropped his bag of money in a chair and stood looking out the windows at the city.
He realized he was all alone and needed someone to share his good fortune.
He called the front desk and told the clerk to send up one of the best, high-priced call girls in the city.
Thirty minutes later there was a knock on the more...