Hitler Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    One jewish man tells a joke to a woman, so he says:
    "Why did hitler commit suicide?"
    She said: "I don't know."
    he replies:".... He saw the gas bill."
    Then she said:"That's horrible! How could you say that!"
    And he replies: "I'm sorry, I really shouldn't be joking about the holocaust. My great grandfather died in concentration camp."
    The girl replies: "I'm so sorry to hear that."
    And he says: "Yeah, it's sad, he fell off the guard tower."

    man looks down the bar and sees a man that looks like adolph hitler he walks up to him and says are you hitler? the man stands up and says real loud yes i am adolph hitler i killed 6 million jews and 3 clowns, the man says why did you kill 3 clowns? hitlers says see what i mean, no one cares about the jews.

    Why did Hitler commit suicide?
    - He got his gas bill

    Bill Clinton dies and goes to hell. Satan is giving him a VIP tour, showing him his options for spending eternity.They come to a room marked "Hitler." Inside is Eva Braun, torturing Adolf Hitler with red-hot irons. Every time Hitler tries to escape, Eva applies another iron. "I can't spend eternity like that," says Clinton. "Show me something else." Satan takes him to another room marked "Jack the Ripper."Inside are three mutilated prostitutes, stretching Jack on the rack.Every time Jack screams, the whores turn the wheel a little more. "I can't spend eternity like that, either," says Clinton. "Show me something better." Satan takes Bill to the last door.Inside, Kenneth Starr is being held up to the wall with chains around his wrists. At his groin is Monica Lewinsky giving him oral sex. Bill smiles. "Yes!" he shouts, "that's for me." Satan smirks and says "Good choice, Mr. President."He looks more...

    A guy walks into a bar in Argentina. He sees a familiar character, albeit much older now, sitting at the bar. He approaches, examines his face, and asks:
    "Excuse me, but aren't you Adolf Hitler?"
    "Vy yes, I am Adolf Hitler."
    "But I thought you were dead!"
    "Ach. I get a lot of dat. But in fact, I am chust biding my time, planning a scheme to kill fifty million Jews and eight of der Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders."
    "What?" the guy exclaims. "Why would you want to kill eight of the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders?"
    Hitler turns to another fellow sitting at the bar next to him. "You see vat I mean? Nobody gives a damn about da Jews!!!"

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