Halfway thru bootcamp the hairlip calls home to his buddy. Man this is tough, the drill seargent took three of us way up in a plane.He opened the door and told the first guy JUMP! and the guy did. He grabbed the next guy and said JUMP! and he did.He looked at me and said JUMP! I told him no i just can't. He pulled out his big thang and said, you jump or i'm gonna screw you with this. My goodness said his buddy, did you jump? Well yeah said the hairlip, a little bit right at first.
There was a boy who lost his eye and his parents coulsnt afford a glass eye so they got him a wooden eye. When he went to prom a few years later he saw a girl with a hairlip and asked her to dance and she said" WOULD EYE! WOULD EYE!" and so he thought if she made fun of him he would make fun of her so he said " HAiRlIP!"
a midget with a hairlip finds a racehorse for sale so he goes to see it.
He tells the man selling the horse that he will have to be lifted up to see what he needs to see, the man agrees.
the midget says " furst i need ta see de eawrs"
the man lifts him up and the midget says "vewy nice vewy nice pewfect fo a wacehorse"
the midget then asks to see the eyes and the man lifts him up getting a little annoyed.
the midget says " vewy nice vewy nice pewfect eyes fo a wacehorse"
the midget says " i need to see the teef and thats all"
the man now extremely angry, lifts him up
the midget says " vewy nice vewy shawp vewy nice teef fo a wacehorse"
the man puts the midget down and the midget says " thewre is one mo fing i need to see, i would like to see hew twat"
The man now really angry says " good here ya go" lifts the horses tail and shoves the midget right in there.
The midget more...
When I was in high school I had a friend who had a wooden eye (this was a long time ago). He was very insecure about it. Come senior year he didn't have a date for the Prom. There was a beautiful girl he liked, but had a hairlip (this gave her an extreme lisp) we decided to set them up. He goes up to her and asks her out to the Prom. She said, "Oh, wouldn't I, wouldn't I?" and he said, "Hairlip, hairlip." and they never spoke again.