A man observed a woman in the grocery store with a three year old girl in her basket. As they passed the cookie section, the child asked for cookies and her mother told her "no." The little girl immediately began to whine and fuss, and the mother said quietly, "Now Ellen, we just have half of the aisles left to go through; don't be upset. It won't be long." He passed the Mother again in the candy aisle. Of course, the little girl began to shout for candy. When she was told she couldn't have any, she began to cry. The mother said, "There, there, Ellen, don't cry. Only two more aisles to go, and then we'll be checking out." The man again happened to be behind the pair at the check-out, where the little girl immediately began to clamor for gum and burst into a terrible tantrum upon discovering there would be no gum purchased today. The mother patiently said, "Ellen, we'll be through this ch eck out stand in five minutes, and then you can go home and more...
Why do worms taste like chewing gum? Because theyre wrigleys!
A Sri Lankan is calmly having his breakfast when an American, typically chewing gum, sits down beside him. The Sri Lankan ignores the American who begins to chat:
The American: Do you eat that bread-entirely?
The Sri Lankan: Of course!
The American: We do not. We only eat the inner part, the crust is put in a container, later processed, transformed into flour and then sold to Sri Lanka. The Sri Lankan says nothing.
The American continues: Do you eat this jelly with the bread?
The Sri Lankan repeats: Of course.
The American: We do not. We eat our fresh fruits for breakfast; we keep all the peels and seeds in the containers. Later we process it, and transform it into jelly and then we sell it to Sri Lanka.
The Sri Lankan asks: And what do you do with the condoms after you use them?
The American: We throw them away, of course!
The Sri Lankan: We do not. We keep them in containers, process them, transform them in to chewing gum and more...
Asian guy is having his "SNACK" ( bread and jam) when an American man chuckling chewing gum, sits down next to him. The Asian ignores the American who, nevertheless, starts a conversation. American: "You Asian folks eat the whole bread??" Asian (in a bad mood): "Of course." American: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. In the States, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them
into croissants and export them to Asia." The American has a smirk on his face. The Asia listens in silence. The American persists: "D'ya eat jelly with the bread??" Asian: "Of Course." American: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We don't. In the States we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and export them to Asia. " The Asian ( pissed of) then asks: "Do you have sex more...
A boy sat on a train chewing gum and staring vacantly into space, when suddenly an old woman sitting opposite said,' It's no good you talking to me, young man, I'm stone deaf! '