Greeted Jokes / Recent Jokes
At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth" - even when you don't know anything. The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."
I Know the Whole Truth "At school, a boy was more...
Two Irish friends greeted each other while waiting their turn at the bank window. "This reminds me of Finnegan," remarked one. "What about Finnegan?" inquired the other. "Tis a story that Finnegan died, and when he greeted St. Peter, he said: Its a fine job youve had here for a long time. Well, Finnegan, said St. Peter, here we count a million years as a minute and a million dollars as a cent. Ah! said Finnegan, Im needing cash. Lend me a cent. Sure, said St. Peter, just wait a minute."
Two Irish friends
greeted each
other while waiting their turn at the bank window. "This
reminds me of
Finnegan," remarked one.
"What about Finnegan?" inquired the
other.
"'Tis a story that Finnegan died, and when he greeted St.
Peter, he
said:' It's a fine job you've had here for a long
time.'' Well,
Finnegan,' said St. Peter,' here we count a million
years as a minute
and a million dollars as a cent.'' Ah!' said
Finnegan,' I'm needing
cash. Lend me a cent.'' Sure,' said St.
Peter,' just wait a
minute.'"
Two Irish friends greeted each other while waiting their turn at the bank window. "This reminds me of Finnegan," remarked one. "What about Finnegan?" inquired the other. "'Tis a story that Finnegan died, and when he greeted St. Peter, he said:' It's a fine job you've had here for a long time.'' Well, Finnegan,' said St. Peter,' here we count a million years as a minute and a million dollars as a cent.'' Ah!' said Finnegan,' I'm needing cash. Lend me a cent.'' Sure,' said St. Peter,' just wait a minute.'"
Posted in a foreign country, a young soldier was greeted by the colonel of his new regiment. "You'll like it here, Caruthers," he said. "We keep ourselves entertained. On Monday we have a high-stakes poker session and..." "I don't gamble, sir," interrupted Caruthers. "Never mind. Tuesday is drinking night." "I don't drink, sir," said Caruthers. "I've taken the pledge." "OK," said the colonel. "Maybe Wednesday is up your street. Girls from the village entertain us, if you know what I mean." "I don't go with loose women," said Caruthers. "Look here!" barked the colonel. "You're not queer, lad, are you?" "Certainly not," replied Caruthers. "Ah, well," sighed the colonel. "Then you won't like Thursday night either."
Bill and Ned walk into a fast food joint one afternoon to get lunch. Bill orders and the cashier gives him his meal. Ned goes up to order and the cashier greets him with "Hello Ned! How are you? Hey everybody! Ned's here!" Everybody in the restaurant comes up and says hello to Ned. After everyone has greeted him, Bill and Ned sit down and begin to eat.
"Ned, you're pretty popular!" says Bill. "I'm the most popular man in the world," says Ned.
"Now Ned," says Bill, your pretty popular but you're not the most popular man in the world."
"Oh yeah," Ned replies "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I'm friends with anybody you can name!"
"That so?" answers Bill, "How about the President of the United States?"
"Let's go!" says Ned.
The two fly to Washington and knock on the front door of the White House. The president answers, more...
Bill and sardarji walk into a fast food joint one afternoon to get lunch. Bill orders and the cashier gives him his meal. Sardarji goes up to order and the cashier greets him with "hello sardarji! How are you? Hey everybody! Sardarji's here!" everybody in the restaurant comes up and says hello to sardarji. After everyone has greeted him, bill and sardarji sit down and begin to eat.
"sardarji, you're pretty popular!" says bill. "i'm the most popular man in the world," says sardarji.
"now sardarji," says bill, your pretty popular but you're not the most popular man in the world."
"oh yeah," sardarji replies "i'll bet you a thousand dollars that i'm friends with anybody you can name!"
"that so?" answers bill, "how about the president of the united states?"
"let's go!" says sardarji.
The two fly to more...