Gina Jokes

After the annual office party, John woke up with a headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom he was able to make his way downstairs, where his wife was preparing breakfast. "Gina," he moaned, "tell me what went on last night. Was it as bad as I think?" "Even worse," she declared, her voice dripping with scorn. "You made a complete jerk of yourself, succeeded in antagonizing the entire board of directors, and insulted the president of the company to his face!" "He's an jerk, piss on him." "You did," Gina informed him. "And he fired you." "Well, screw him!," said John. "I did. You're back at work on Monday!"

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Gina!
Gina who!
Gina you don't recognize me!

Three nuns die and go to heaven. They are met at the pearly gates by St.
Peter, who tells them they led such good lives they will be permitted to
return to earth as anyone they want.
The first nun thinks it over and says
"I'd like to return as Sophia Loren."
St. Peter says "Fine, you can return as Sophia Loren."
The second nun thinks and says "I'd like to be Gina Lollabrigida."
St. Peter says "No problem, you can return as Gina Lollabrigida."
The third nun says "I think I'd like to be Virginia Pipeline."
St. Peter says, "Hmmm, I don't think I know of anyone named Virginia
Pipeline."
At which point the third nun shows him the headline from the morning
paper: "Virginia Pipeline Laid by 25 Men"

Three nuns die and go to heaven. They are met at the pearly gates by St. Peter, who tells them they led such good lives they will be permitted to return to earth as anyone they want.The first nun thinks it over and says "I'd like to return as Sophia Loren."St. Peter says "Fine, you can return as Sophia Loren."The second nun thinks and says "I'd like to be Gina Lollobrigida."St. Peter says "No problem, you can return as Gina Lollobrigida."The third nun says "I think I'd like to be Virginia Pipeline."St. Peter says, "Hmmm, I don't think I know of anyone named Virginia Pipeline?"At which point the third nun shows him the headline from the morning paper: "Virginia Pipeline Laid by 25 Men"

A nursing assistant, floor nurse, and charge nurse from a small nursing home were taking a lunch break in the break room. In walks a lady dressed in silk scarves and wearing large polished stoned jewelry.

"I am' Gina the Great'," stated the lady. "I am so pleased with the way you have taken care of my aunt that I will now grant the next three wishes!" With a wave of her hand and a puff of smoke, the room was filled with flowers, fruit and bottles of drink, proving that she did have the power to grant wishes before any of the nurses could think otherwise.

The nurses quickly argued among themselves as to which one would ask for the first wish. Speaking up, the nursing assistant wished first.

"I wish I were on a tropical island beach, with single, well-built men feeding me fruit and tending to my every need." With a puff of smoke, the nursing assistant was gone.

The floor nurse went next. "I wish I were rich more...