Fall Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    South Dakota Dumb Laws

    Hot 2 years ago

    - It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory.
    - Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden.
    - If there are more than 5 Native Americans on your property you may shoot them.
    - Spearfish: If three or more Indians are walking down the street together, they can be considered a war party and fired upon.

    Christopher Columbus was stranded in Jamaica and needed supplies. He knew that an eclipse was to occur the next day. He told the tribal chief, "The God who protects me will punish you. Unless you give me supplies this night, a vengeance will fall upon you and the moon shall lose its light!"
    When the eclipse darkened the sky, Columbus got all the supplies he needed.
    In the early 1900s, and Englishman tried the same trick on a Sudanese chieftain. "If you do not follow my order," he warned, "vengeance will fall upon you and the moon will lose its light."
    "If you're referring to the lunar eclipse," the Sudanese chieftain replied, "that doesn't happen until the day after tomorrow."

    These Two Fleas...

    Hot 5 years ago

    These two fleas are sitting in Florida. One is shivering like crazy, saying "that has got to be the coldest ride I have ever had in my life!"
    "How did you get here?" asks the other flea.
    "I was in the moustache of some guy riding his motorcycle down the freeway."
    "That is no way to travel to Florida" says the flea."Here is what you do. Go to the airport and find a lounge. Have a sip of someone's drink so you are relaxed. Find a really pretty girl and crawl up her leg and under her dress.G o inside her panties and you will find a nice warm place to curl up and fall asleep. The next thing you know, you are in Florida! Remember that for next time.We will get together next year and you can tell me how it went!"
    The following year, the two fleas are back in Florida and the first
    one is shivering like crazy. "That is the coldest f*%#in' ride to
    Florida I have had in my life!!!"
    "What happened to the more...

    Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
    Because it was dead.
    Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
    Because it was hit by the first koala.
    Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
    Because it thought it was a game and joined in.

    15 Fun Things to do in Public Areas
    (I actually did all of these)
    1. Go up to random people and ask "How are you doing?" See what kind of conversation you can start.
    (I met lots of new people this way)
    2. Ask someone what another person's name is nearby. Go up to that person and say "Hey, *person's name*. How are you? You forgot my name, again, didn't you!?" (People normally look at me very confused with this one.)
    3. Fall down in front of strangers, and see if they try to help. (If they don't help, I yell out, "FINE! DON'T HELP ME THEN!")
    4. Bump into someone and pretend it causes you to fall down. See if they apologize. (This is hard to do, because they normally try to avoid me when I try to bump them.)
    5. Walk behind someone until he/she turns around. Then say, "What?" (You should look very confused, so it makes them be confused also.)
    6. Run around and jump on things and make noises pretending to be a more...

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