Emily Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Empty Stomach

    Hot 1 year ago

    Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, "That's because it's empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it." The next day, the pastor was over at Emily's family's house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, "That's because it's empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it."

    Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, "That`s because it's empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it." The next day, the pastor was over at Emily's family's house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, "That's because it's empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it."

    One day in Sunday school, the teacher was talking about Jesus is to the kids, "Bobby, where is Jesus?" asked the teacher. "Jesus is in heaven." replied Bobby. "Very good!", said the teacher. The teacher then asked a little girl," Where is Jesus, Emily?". Emily said innocently, "Jesus is in my heart!". The teacher beamed at little Emily and said, "How very sweet!!!". The teacher now asked Timmy, "Timmy, where is Jesus?". "Jesus is in my bathroom." he said assuredly. "Please elaborate, Timmy.", the teacher said. Timmy then replied, "Well, every morning my dad gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells. Jesus Christ, are you still in there!!!"

    Tabby Cat

    Hot 1 year ago

    A woman took her 6-year-old daughter to pick out some fish at the pet store. While there, they walked past the caged cats, and little Emily got curious.
    "Mommy, mommy! I wanna look at the kitties."
    So they went over to them. Little Emily looked at each pair of cats in each cage, they were set up into pairs of cat species that got along with each other. Little Emily pointed at each cage and asked her mom what the name of each species was.
    "Mommy, what's that?" she asked.
    "Why, that's a Himalayan."
    "What about THAT one?"
    "That's a Persian."
    And so it went on. When she reached the last cage, little Emily noticed that one of the cats was on top of each other. Pointing to the one on top, she asked "Mommy, what's that one?"
    "A Tabby,"
    "What are they doing?"
    After thinking for a second, the mother said, "Well, they're mating."
    A week later, little Emily's more...

    Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911. The 911operator told Bubba that she would send someone outright away."Where do you live?" asked the operator.Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"There was a long pause and finally Bubba said,"How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and youpick her up there?"

  • Recent Activity