Elections Jokes

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    The best way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

    Arkansas Scholars

    Hot 6 years ago

    Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laugh too hard - one of these may be the president someday.)
    Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
    Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
    Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
    Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
    Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
    Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets a election.
    Q: What are steroids? A: more...

    A Washington Post/ABC News poll reveals that more than 80% of Americans favor major changes in the way elections are conducted.
    Chage number one BETTER CANDIDATES!

    It seems that the Republic of Korea, under pressure, decided to hold
    free and fair elections, U.S.-style. They decided to go all out: voter
    registration drives, canvasses, polls, high quality voting machines
    from the Chicago Voting Machine Company, the whole bit.
    Anyhow, the campaigns were mounted, the elections held, the results
    tallied, and sure enough, the new President-elect of the
    Republic of Korea was Richard J. Daley.

    ...amid reports of corruption and voter fraud, the UN has sent a delegation to Kabul to verify the Afghanistan elections results. The UN council found no evidence of tampering or voter fraud and have certified Hamid Karzai as the winner with approximately 115% of the vote.

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