Earrings Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me. ..
    A batch of my special hand-print cookies. I had turned my back to grab the cookie sheet sitting on the stove. In that micro-second, Sara climbed onto the table, poked her paw into the delightfully kneady mixture and, suddenly off-balance, fell into the cookie dough. Net loss? Six cups of flour, four cups of sugar, three sticks of butter. .. Of course, it would have been cheaper to remove the feline ingredient, pick out the hairs, and just rename the recipe Paw Print Cookies.
    On the second day of Christmas, my kitten accompanied me. ..
    On a trip to the vet clinic. Who knew that skinny curling ribbon has feline taste appeal? I didn't. Damages: $28 for the office visit, $36 for anesthesia so the veterinarian could take $55 X-rays in case Sara had taste-tested any other Christmas decorations, and a heck of a lot of embarrassment when the vet removed the 3' curly tail in slightly less than two seconds by tugging at more...

    Q. What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
    A. (Screaming) "I said. I'm drunk!"
    Q. Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
    A. Because red means stop.
    Q. Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
    A. They have to have some place to rest their ankles.
    Q. Why do blondes where big hoop earrings?
    A. To put their feet through.
    Q. What's a brunette's mating call?
    A. Has that blonde gone yet?
    A2. When is that blonde bitch going to leave!?
    A3. "All the blondes have gone home!"
    Q. What do you say to a blonde that won't give in?
    A. "Have another beer."
    Q. Why is a blonde like a door knob?
    A. Because everybody gets a turn.
    Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a Porsche?
    A. You don't lend the Porsche out to your friend.
    Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush?
    A. You don't let your best friend borrow your toothbrush.
    Q. What is the difference between more...

    On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me... A batch
    of my special hand-print cookies.

    I had turned my back to grab the cookie sheet sitting on the stove.
    In that micro-second, Fluffy climbed onto the table, poked her paw
    into the delightfully kneady mixture and, suddenly off-balance,
    fell into the cookie dough. Net loss? Six cups of flour, four cups
    of sugar, three sticks of butter. Of course, it would have been
    cheaper to remove the feline ingredient, pick out the hairs, and
    just rename the recipe Paw Print Cookies.


    On the second day of Christmas, my kitten accompanied me.... On a
    trip to the vet clinic.

    Who knew that skinny curling ribbon has feline taste appeal? I
    didn't. Damages? $28 for the office visit, $36 for anesthesia so
    the veterinarian could take $55 X-rays in case Fluffy had taste-
    tested any other Christmas decorations, and a heck of a lot of
    embarrassment more...

    On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me...
    A batch of my special hand-print cookies. I had turned my back to grab the cookie sheet sitting on the stove. In that micro-second, Sara climbed onto the table, poked her paw into the delightfully kneady mixture and, suddenly off-balance, fell into the cookie dough. Net loss? Six cups of flour, four cups of sugar, three sticks of butter... Of course, it would have been cheaper to remove the feline ingredient, pick out the hairs, and just rename the recipe Paw Print Cookies.
    On the second day of Christmas, my kitten accompanied me...
    On a trip to the vet clinic. Who knew that skinny curling ribbon has feline taste appeal? I didn't. Damages: $28 for the office visit, $36 for anesthesia so the veterinarian could take $55 X-rays in case Sara had taste-tested any other Christmas decorations, and a heck of a lot of embarrassment when the vet removed the 3' curly tail in slightly less than two seconds by tugging at it with more...

    Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: They have to have some place to rest their ankles. Q: Why do blondes where big hoop earrings? A: To put their feet through.

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