Dubya Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    One night George Bush awakens from a fitfull sleep to find himself visited by the ghost of George Washington. Dubya begs of Washington's spirit, "Tell me: As president, what's the best thing I can do for my country?"
    "That's easy," replies Washington's Ghost. "Set an honest and honorable example, just like I did." And with that he was gone.
    On the next night George Bush awakens from a fitfill sleep to find himself visited by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson. Duby begs of Jefferson's spirit, "Tell me: As president, what's the best thing I can do for my country?"
    "That's easy," replies Jefferson's Ghost. "Cut taxes and streamline the federal government, just like I did." And with that he was gone.
    On the third night George Bush awakens from a fitfull sleep to find himself visited by the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. Dubya begs of Lincoln's spirit, "Tell me: As president, what's the best thing I can do for my more...

    George W. Bush, Bill Clinton and Al Gore all arrive in heaven where an angel meets them. "All of you must cross this river and we shall judge how much you have sinned based upon how far you sink," says the angel.
    Dubya goes first and sinks up to his neck, but makes it across. As he looks back he sees Al Gore walking on the water.
    "What gives?" Dubya whines to the angel. "He's sinned just as much as I have."
    "He's standing on Bill's shoulders!" replies the angel.

    Anti-War Slogans

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    Editor's Note: These are, naturally, from the era of the Bush administration...

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    Draft The Bush Twins

    Don't Mess With Mesopotamia

    War Is SO 20th Century

    When Bush Comes To Shove

    Brains Not Bombs

    War Is A Dick Thing, Peace Is A Heart Thing

    George Dubya: Weapon Of Mass Distraction

    Beat The Bushes For Peace

    Weapons Of Mass Destruction: Look Under The Bushes

    Drop Bush, Not Bombs

    Bombing For Peace Is Like F*cking For Virginity

    Evolve! Work For A Non-violent Future

    If War Is The Answer, We're Asking The Wrong Question

    Killing Innocent People Is The Problem, Not The Solution

    Save America, Spare Iraq, Make Texas Take Him Back

    Real Patriots Drive Hybrids

    Drop Names, Not Bombs

    Who Would Jesus Bomb?

    Stop Mad Cowboy Disease

    George Bush more...

    Al Gore and George W. Bush go to a resteraunt to try to patch things up after the election. They're about to order when Tipper says to Dubya, "What are you having?"
    Bush replies, "I wouldn't mind a quickie."
    Mrs. Gore is outraged and says, "You rude man! Who do you think you are, Bill Clinton?"
    Al leans over to Dubya and says, "George, I think it's actually pronounced 'quiche.'"

    Dick Cheney, President Bush and his father are flying on Air Force One. Dick looks at Dubya, chuckles and says, "You know, I could throw a $100.00 bill out the window right now and make one person very happy."
    Dubya shrugs his shoulders and says, "Well, I could throw ten $10.00 bills out the window and make 10 people very happy." George Bush Senior says, "Of course then, I could throw one-hundred $1.00 bills out the window and make a hundred people very happy."
    The pilot rolls her eyes, looks at all of them and says, "I could throw all of you out the window and make the whole country happy."

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