Drinkin Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The patch thing is going way to far....smoking patches, lose weight patches,
    now this....
    Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of
    bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said "lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a
    poll-ice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!"
    Don't worry, Bubba", Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin'
    these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the
    bottles under the seat".
    "What fer?", asked Bubba.
    "Just let me do the talkin', OK?", said Earl.
    Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and
    each put a label on their forehead. When they reached the roadblock, the
    sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?"
    "No, sir", said Earl. "We're on the patch".

    Catch a drunk driver

    Hot 1 year ago

    Two rednecks, Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud.
    The passenger, Bubba, said "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a police roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!!"
    "Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers then peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat."
    "What fer?", asked Bubba.
    "Just let me do the talkin', OK?," said Earl.
    Well, they finished their beers, threw the empties out of sight & put label on each of their foreheads.
    When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?"
    "No, sir," said Earl while pointing at the labels. "We're on the patch."

    Bubba and Billy Bob were driving down the road, drinking a couple of beer. "Look thar up ahead," said Bubba, "it's a poll-ice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers."
    "Don'tcha worry, Bubba," said Billy Bob, "We'll pull over and finish drinikin' these beers, peel off the labels, stick 'em on our foreheads and throw the bottles under the seat."
    "What fer?" Bubba asked. "Never ya mind, Bubba. Just let me do the talkin'," replied Billy Bob.
    They both finished their beer, put the labels on their foreheads and threw the empty bottles under the seat. When they reached the roadblock, the sherrif asked, "You boys been drinkin'?"
    "No, sir, we're on the patch!" replied Billy Bob.

    GRANDMA GOT RUN OVER BY A REINDEER
    by Irish Rovers (1986?)
    Grandma got run over by a reindeer
    Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
    You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
    But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
    She'd been drinkin' too much egg nog,
    And we'd begged her not to go.
    But she'd left her medication,
    So she stumbled out the door into the snow.
    When they found her Christmas mornin',
    At the scene of the attack.
    There were hoof prints on her forehead,
    And incriminatin' Claus marks on her back.
    Grandma go run over by a reindeer,
    Walkin' home from our house Christmas eve.
    You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
    But as for me and Grandpa, we believe.
    Now were all so proud of Grandpa,
    He's been takin' this so well.
    See him in there watchin' football,
    Drinkin' beer and playin' cards with cousin Belle.
    It's not Christmas without Grandma.
    All the family's dressed in black.
    And more...

    One day, two rednecks named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Buds. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Looky thar up ahead Earl. It's a po-leece roadblock. We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!"
    "Don't worry Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, then throw the bottles under the seat."
    "What fer?" asked Bubba.
    "Just let me do the talking, okay?" said Earl.
    They finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and slapped the labels on their foreheads.
    When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "Have you boys been drinking?" "No sir." said Earl. "We're on the patch."

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