Dreamt Jokes / Recent Jokes

Two small boys, one catholic and one protestant get lost in the woods.
Darkness comes down and they near a monastery. Upon entering they are asked their faith, telling the head monk their religions.
The Catholic lad gets the best of treatment, good food, a good bed near the fireplace. The protestant lad however gets a bowl of cold gruel, and is told to sleep by the drafty door to keep the cold out of the room.
In the morning the head monk asks the boys how it was. "I dreamt I was in heaven, Father" said the Catholic boy. "It was just wonderful."
"I dreamt that I was in hell " said the protestant boy. "And what was that like?" said the holy father. "Just like this place, couldn't get near the fire for catholics!"

Last night I dreamt I was dancing with the most beautiful girl in the world What was I wearing?

Last night I dreamt I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone!

Last night I dreamt I was dancing with the most beautiful girl in the worldWhat was I wearing?

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".

Wife: "I dreamt they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for ten dollars and the thick ones went for twenty dollars." Husband: "How about the ones like mine?" Wife: "Those they gave away." Husband: "I had a dream too... I dreamt they were auctioning off cunts. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand." Wife: "And how much for the ones like mine?" Husband: "That's where they held the auction."

Wife: "I dreamt they were auctioning off dicks. The big ones went for ten dollars and the thick ones went for twenty dollars."
Husband: "How about the ones like mine?"
Wife: "Those they gave away."
Husband: "I had a dream too... I dreamt they were auctioning off cunts. The pretty ones went for a thousand dollars, and the little tight ones went for two thousand."
Wife: "And how much for the ones like mine?"
Husband: "That's where they held the auction."