Dirt Jokes

There was this Spanish guy, this Korean guy and this Russian guy all working for the same construction company. At the beginning of the day the boss comes out and says to the Spanish guy, "You're in charge of the cement." Then he said to the Russian guy, "You're in charge of the dirt." Then he said to the Korean guy, "You're in charge of the supplies." Then he said, "I'm gonna be back at the end of the day to check on your work. It better be good or you're fired." So they all go off to go get their work done. At the end of the day, the boss comes back to check on their work. He looks at the big pile of cement and goes, "Good work," to the Spanish guy. Then he looks at the big pile of dirt and says, "Good work," to the Russian guy. Then he couldn't find the Korean guy so he asks, "Where the heck is the Korean guy??" All of a sudden, the Korean guy jumps out from behind the big pile of dirt and yells, " more...

Here are a couple of my favorite examples of gullible people (true stories).
Back in the days of the Mattel Cabbage Patch Kid craze it was usually
very hard to get one for the kiddies. A radio station (I don't know where)
announced that Mattel was going to get Cabbage Patch Kids out to the people
of this particular city. The plan was that they had to go to the football
field of the local university and wait. An airplane would fly overhead and
the dolls would be dropped onto the field. People were supposed to hold
their credit cards up so that a photographer with a telephoto lens in the
airplane could get the credit card numbers and charge the price of the
dolls to the recipients' accounts.
People actually showed up, waving American Express cards in the breeze.
Another radio station prank took place on April Fool's Day. They
announced that the phone company would be cleaning the dirt out of the
phone lines that afternoon. They do more...

You Know You're From a Small Town When...
The "road hog" in front of you on Main Street is a farmer's combine.
The local phone book has only one yellow page.
Third Street is on the edge of town.
You leave your jacket on the back of the chair in the cafe, and when you go back the next day, it's still there, on the same chair.
You don't signal turns because everyone knows where you're going, anyway.
No social events can be scheduled when the school gym floor is being varnished.
You call a wrong number and they supply you with the correct one.
Everyone knows all the news before it's published; they just read the hometown paper to see whether the publisher got it right.
The city limits signs are both on the same post!
The City jail is called amoeba, because it only has one cell.
The McDonalds only has one Golden Arch.
The one-block-long Main Street dead ends in both directions.
Second Street is in the next town more...

Several years ago, and this story is true, I was riding "shot gun" with a friend on a Road Train.(For our foreign readers - a road Train is a Prime Mover with up to 5 Trailers and they are regularly used for transporting goods and livestock in outback Australia).

We were moving cattle from a cattle station near the Alice up to Katherine and onto Darwin. Nothing special until we were flagged down by a couple of indigenous Australians who had run out of petrol about 250 just outside of Katherine. We pulled up and went back to see what the problem was and they pleaded up to tow them into town(Katherine) we laughed and said that they were crazy to want our truck to tow an old rust bucket of a Ford 250 KM on a dirt road.

Anyway they managed to convince Pete and they produced a large chain and Pete said that the chain would rip the front off the car, because a chain has no give in it and so Pete came up with a tow rope that they could use. They eagerly pushed more...

A man walks into a friend and sees that his friend's caris total loss and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and blood. He asks his friend,"What's happened to your car?""Well," the friend responses, "I ran into a lawyer"."OK," says the man, "that explains the blood... But what about the leaves, the grass, the branches and the dirt?""Well, I had to chase him all through the park."