Deposited Jokes

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    New computer doctor

    Hot 1 year ago

    One day Pete was complaining to his friend "my elbow hurts. I better see a doctor".
    His friend said "Don't do that. There's a computer in the drug store that can diagnose anything. It's quicker and cheaper than visiting a doctor. simply put a urine sample in the machine and it will diagnose your problem and tell you what to do about it. It only costs $10.00."
    Pete figured he had nothing to lose so he filled a jar with a urine sample. He went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited $10.00. The computer started to make a weird noise and various lights began to flash. After a brief pause, a small slip of paper printed. It said:
    You have tennis elbow.
    Soak your arm in warm water,
    avoid heavy labour,
    it will be better in two weeks.
    Later that evening, while thinking how amazing that computer was, Pete began to wonder if it could be fooled. He decided to give it a try.
    He mixed some tap water, a stool more...

    One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt.
    His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
    "Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10."
    Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store.
    Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing.
    After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
    Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled.
    He mixed more...

    A man complained to his friend "My elbow hurts I better go to the doctor." "Don't do that," volunteered his friend "there's a new computer at the drug store that can diagnose any problem quicker and cheaper than a doctor. All you have to do is put in a urine sample, deposit $10, then the computer will give you your diagnosis and plan of treatment."
    The man figured he had nothing to lose so he took a sample of urine down to the drug store. Finding the machine, he poured in the urine and deposited the $10. The machine began to buzz and various lights flashed on and off. After a short pause, a slip of paper popped out on which was printed:
    You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water twice a day. Avoid heavy labor. Your elbow will be better in two weeks
    That evening as the man contemplated this breakthrough in medical science, he began to suspect fraud. To test his theory he mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and more...

    A man complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor."
    His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10.00."
    The man figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00.
    The computer started making some noises and the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed:
    You have tennis elbow
    Soak your arm in warm water.
    Avoid heavy labor
    It will be better in two weeks.
    Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if more...

    A man that complained to his friends "My elbow really hurts." I guess I should go see a doctor.
    His friend offered DON'T DO THAT! There's a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. And it only costs $10.00
    The man figured that he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drugstore. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample, and deposited the ten dollars. The computer started making some noises and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed:
    You have tennis elbow
    Soak you're arm in warm water
    Avoid heavy labour
    It will be better in two weeks
    Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if more...

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