Denver Jokes / Recent Jokes

A wreath shaped like a peace sign is satanic according to some Denver residents. "We also believe christmas trees are nests for Keebler elves."

It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.It is illegal for liquor stores to sell food or grocery stores to sell any alcohol except beer that is at most 3.2% alcohol.

It is illegal for a woman wearing a red dress to be out on the streets after 7 PM.Colorado law requires that wine be sold in containers of at least 24 ounces and spirits in containers at least a fifth of a gallon. But, at the same time, it also decrees that no alcohol beverage can be stored in hotel minibars in anything larger than miniature containers. Colorado Springs: It is permissible to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays. Crippe Creek: It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building. Denver: The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.Denver: It is unlawful to lend your more...

MICHAEL KENNEDY What's the difference between John Denver and Michael Kennedy? John Denver made it alive out of Aspen. Has Elton John re-written any of his songs for Michael Kennedy? Not yet, but he's done one about the tree: "I'm Still Standing" How can you be sure that Michael was really a Kennedy? Check the family tree. A simple accident? Some witnesses insist there was a second tree at the snow-covered knoll... What do Michael and JFK Jr's magazine "George" have in common? Wood pulp. New bumper sticker...."Plant A Tree....Kill A Kennedy...." What will it take to reunite the four Kennedy brothers? A1: One more bullet. A2: A season lift pass.

A receptionist answered the phone in a busy office, "Good afternoon, Denver Parachute Club. How may I help you?"
"Pardon me, but isn't this the Denver Prostitute Club?" asked a startled man on the other end.
"No, sir," the embarrassed receptionist replied. "This is the Denver Parachute Club."
"Oh, dear," the man said. "I'm afraid I've made a big mistake. Your salesman called a week ago and signed me up for two jumps a week."

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Denver!
Denver who?
Denver the good old days!

MICHAEL KENNEDY What's the difference between John Denver and Michael Kennedy? John Denver made it alive out of Aspen. Has Elton John re-written any of his songs for Michael Kennedy? Not yet, but he's done one about the tree: "I'm Still Standing" How can you be sure that Michael was really a Kennedy? Check the family tree. A simple accident? Some witnesses insist there was a second tree at the snow-covered knoll... What do Michael and JFK Jr's magazine "George" have in common? Wood pulp. New bumper sticker...." Plant A Tree.... Kill A Kennedy...." What will it take to reunite the four Kennedy brothers? A1: One more bullet. A2: A season lift pass.

What's the difference between John Denver and Michael Kennedy?
John Denver made it alive out of Aspen.
Has Elton John re-written any of his songs for Michael Kennedy?
Not yet, but he's done one about the tree: "I'm Still Standing"
How can you be sure that Michael was really a Kennedy?
Check the family tree.
A simple accident? Some witnesses insist there was a second tree at
the
snow-covered knoll...
What do Michael and JFK Jr's magazine "George" have in common?
Wood pulp.
New bumper sticker...."Plant A Tree.... Kill A Kennedy...."
What will it take to reunite the four Kennedy brothers?
A1: One more bullet.
A2: A season lift pass.