Dare Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The Name Game

    Hot 1 year ago

    If Kitty Carlisle married Conway Twitty, she'd be Kitty Twitty. If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono. If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali. If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho. If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra. If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg (hey! it's the' 90's!), he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg. If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John. If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster. If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting. If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver. If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh. How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou. If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then more...

    Marriages

    Hot 7 years ago

    If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.
    If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
    If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
    If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
    If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, hey! it's the '90's!, he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg.
    If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elto John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
    If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.
    If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
    If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
    If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.
    How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.
    If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny more...

    Christmas Italian Style
    'Twas the night before Christmas,
    Da whole house was mella
    Not a creature was stirrin',
    Cuz I had a gun unda my pilla.
    When up on da roof
    I heard somethin' pound,
    I sprung to da window,
    To scream, "YO! Keep it down!"
    When what to my
    Wonderin' eyes should appear,
    But da Don of all elfs,
    And eight friggin' reindeer!
    Wit' slicked back black hair,
    And a silk red suit,
    Don Santa wuz here,
    And he brought all da loot!
    Wit' a slap to dare snouts,
    And a yank on dare manes,
    He cursed and he shouted,
    And he called dem by name.
    "Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,
    Yo Vinny, Yo Vito,
    Ay Joey, Ay Paulie,
    Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!"
    As I drew out my gun
    And hid by da bed,
    He flew troo da winda
    And slapped me 'side da head.
    "What da hell you doin'
    Pullin' a gun on da Don?
    Now all you're gettin' is coal,
    You friggin' moron!"
    Den pointin' a more...

    If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.
    If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
    If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
    If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
    If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, he'd be Cat Doggy Dogg.
    If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
    If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.
    If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
    If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
    If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.
    How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd be Boog Alou.
    If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny G., he'd be G. Ghali more...

    If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, she'd be Yoko Ono Bono.
    If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she'd be Dolly Dali.
    If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she'd be Bo Ho.
    If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she'd be Oprah Chopra.
    If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, hey! it's the '90's!, he'd be
    Cat Doggy Dogg.
    If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry
    Elton John, she'd be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
    If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman
    Munster, she'd become Sondra Locke Ness Monster.
    If Bea Arthur married Sting, she'd be Bea Sting.
    If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married
    Jerry Mathers, she'd be Liv Ito Beaver.
    If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he'd be Snoop Doggy Dogg
    Pooh.
    How about a baseball marriage? If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he'd
    be Boog Alou.
    If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then more...

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