Curve Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Mumbai to Pune

    Hot 5 months ago

    This happened about a month or two ago near Lonavala and even though it sounds like something out of the X-Files or from an Alfred Hitchcock movie... it's real! This guy drives from Mumbai to Pune and decides not to take the new expressway as he wants to see the scenery. The inevitable happens and when he reaches the ghats his car breaks down - he's stranded miles from nowhere. Having no choice he starts walking on the side of the road, hoping to get a lift to the nearest human habitation. It's dark and raining and pretty soon he's wet and shivering. The night rolls on and no car goes by, the monsoon rains are so strong he can hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he sees a car coming towards him. It slows and then stops next to him - without thinking the guy opens the car's door and jumps in. Seated in the back, he leans forward to thank the person who had saved him when he realizes there is nobody behind the wheel!!!
    Even though there's no one in the front seat and no more...

    RECOUNT DEMANDED BY METS
    NEW YORK (AP) -The New York Mets announced today that they are going to court to get an additional inning added to the end of Game 5 of the World Series. The batting, pitching, and bench coaches for the Mets held a press conference earlier today. They were joined by members of the Major League Players Union. "We meant to hit those pitches from the Yankee pitchers," said the Mets batting coach. "We were confused by the irregularities of the pitches we received and believe we have been denied our right to hit."
    One claim specifically noted that a small percentage of the Mets batters had intended to swing at fast balls, but actually swung at curve balls. It was clear that these batters never intended to swing at curve balls, though a much higher percentage were not confused by the pitches. Reporters at the press conference pointed out that the Mets had extensively reviewed film of the Yankees pitchers prior to the World Series and had more...

    RECOUNT DEMANDED BY METSNEW YORK (AP) -The New York Mets announced today that they are going to court to get an additional inning added to the end of Game 5 of the World Series. The batting, pitching, and bench coaches for the Mets held a press conference earlier today. They were joined by members of the Major League Players Union. "We meant to hit those pitches from the Yankee pitchers," said the Mets batting coach. "We were confused by the irregularities of the pitches we received and believe we have been denied our right to hit."One claim specifically noted that a small percentage of the Mets batters had intended to swing at fast balls, but actually swung at curve balls. It was clear that these batters never intended to swing at curve balls, though a much higher percentage were not confused by the pitches. Reporters at the press conference pointed out that the Mets had extensively reviewed film of the Yankees pitchers prior to the World Series and had in fact more...

    Santa was on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark night and in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling and no car went by.
    The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly, he saw a car coming towards him and stop.
    Santa, without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door and only then realized that there's nobody behind the wheel! The car starts very slowly.
    Santa looks at the road and sees a curve coming his way. Scared, he starts to pray, begging for his life. He hasn't come out of shock when, just before the car hits the curve, a hand appears thru the window and moves the wheel. Santa, paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand appears every time they are approaching a curve.
    Santa, gathering strength, gets out of the car and runs all the way to the nearest town. Wet and in shock he goes into a bar, asks for two shots of whiskey, and starts telling everybody about the horrible experience he just went more...

    This story happened about a month ago in a little town in Louisiana, and sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale.
    This guy is on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark night in the middle of a storm. The night passes slowly and no cars come by. The storm is so strong he can see hardly a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he sees a car slowly looming, ghostlike, out of the gloom. It slowly creeps toward him and stops. Reflexively, the guy gets into the car and closes the door, then realizes that there is nobody behind the wheel. The car slowly starts moving again.
    The guy is terrified, too scared to think of jumping out and running. The guy sees that the car is slowly approaching a sharp curve. The guy starts to pray, begging for his life, sure the ghost car will go off the road
    and he will plunge to his death when, just before the curve, a hand appears thru the window and turns the steering wheel, guiding the car safely
    around the bend.
    Paralyzed with terror, more...

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