Correspondent Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Our correspondent in Poland reports that Wojciech Jaruzelski, Tadeusz
    Mazowiecki and Lech Walesa met in a summit conference, and the only thing
    that they could agree on was that George Bush has a funny name.
    From the SF Chronicle, Herb Caen's column

    CNN gets news that 100 blonds are killed in a
    train accident at Marylebone station. Only one blond
    left alive.
    The correspondent goes to her and asks, "Miss, how did it happen?"
    Blond: "Oh don't ask about it. All were right as long
    as all were waiting on the platform for the train. Then came the announcement that 'The bakerloo line will arrive on platform number 2' so when everyone heard that the train is coming on the platform, everyone ran to the rails to save their lives, and the train arrived on the rails!!!"
    Correspondent: "Thank god you thought well and didn't go to the rails"
    Blond: "Oh no, I was on the rails for committing
    suicide and after the announcement I came to the
    platform!"

    The BBC Gaza correspondent is sitting in her air conditioned hotel in the Gaza strip, sipping iced tea when her mobile phone begins to ring. She picks up the phone and hears a mysterious voice say, " comrade this is the ruling council of the military wing of Hamas and I would like to inform you that those Israeli pigs have just massacred hundreds of Palastinian women and children. "
    The BBC correspondent then asks the mysterious stranger on the phone where and when this had happened but was just given the address of the small provincial hospital just inside the Israeli border where he claimed hundreds of surviving casualties had been taken earlier and informed her that all her expenses would be covered as usual.
    Armed with this information she realises that she can finally prove to the world just how evil these Israeli, American Jewish lobby supported pigs really are. So she makes her way as quickly as possible across the border into Israel and to the more...

    During a news conference yesterday in Iraq, President Bush ducked two shoes that were thrown at him by an Arabic television correspondent. An Iraqi authority was asked if the man would be punished. "Of course, he will punished," the Iraqi authority said, "he missed."

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