Contractor Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Green Side Up

    Hot 1 year ago

    A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about a job. In the first room, she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out
    "GREEN SIDE UP!"
    In the second room, she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!" The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing.
    In the third room, she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"
    The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?"
    "I'm sorry," came the reply. "But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street."

    Pay Day

    Hot 9 months ago

    A building contractor, working on a job that would take several months, was being paid weekly. Looking at the check he had just received, he approached the owner of the property.
    "Excuse me, but this check is two hundred and fifty dollars less than we had agreed upon," he said.
    "Yes, I know," said the owner. "Last week I overpaid you by two hundred and fifty dollars and you never complained."
    "I don't mind an occasional mistake," replied the contractor, "but when it starts to be a habit I feel I have to bring it to your attention."

    A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "GREEN SIDE UP!"
    In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!" The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing.
    In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"
    The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?"
    "I'm sorry," came the reply."But I have a crew of engineers laying sod across the street.

    A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In the first room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "GREEN SIDE UP!"In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!" The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing.In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?""I'm sorry," came the reply."But I have a crew of engineers laying sod across the street.

    A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job. In thefirst room she said she would like a pale blue. The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out "GREEN SIDE UP!".In the second room she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow. He wrote this on his pad, walked to the window, opened it, and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!".The lady was somewhat curious but she said nothing. In the third room she said she would like it painted a warm rose color. The painter wrote this down, walked to the window, opened it and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!".The lady then asked him, "Why do you keep yelling 'green side up'?"."I'm sorry," came the reply. "But I have a crew of blondes laying sod across the street."

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