Consultants Jokes / Recent Jokes

A bloke is driving around in his Porsche in the countryside. He stops outside a field full of sheep, walks up to the shepherd and says
"I've got an offer. I'll guess how many sheep you've got in this field, and if I guess right, I get to take a sheep with me. If I guess wrong, you get my car."

The shepherd thinks he's on to a sure thing and agrees.
"137" says the driver. "Damn me, you're right.", says the shepherd and dutifully hands over a sheep.

The man walks away, stuffs the sheep in his car, and is about to drive away when the shepherd knocks on his window. "I've got a proposal for you." says the shepherd. "If I can guess what you do for a living, I get to take your car. If I'm wrong, you can have all my sheep."

"Done", says the driver
"You're a consultant.", says the shepherd. "Bloody hell, how did you guess?"

"Easy. You come in here more...

Q: How many consultants does it take to change a light bulb?
A: We don't know. They never get past the feasibility study.