Complex Jokes / Recent Jokes

Private Milton went to psychiatrist and complained: "I have an inferiority complex." "Nothing I can do for you", said the doc." In the Army privates don't have an inferiority complex... they're just inferior..."--------------------------------------------------------------------------------An old man saw a very tired infantryman resting after a hard foot march. The man said with disdain: "When I was of your age I thought nothing of a ten-mile hike." "Well, I don't think much of it either," replied the GI.

When working hard, be sure to get up and retch every so often.

When working on a project, if you put away a tool that you`re you`re finished with, you will need it instantly.

When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer, provided of course you know that there is a problem.

When you are confronted by any complex social system, such as an urban center or a hamster, with things about it that you`re dissatisfied with and anxious to fix, you cannot just step in and set about fixing with much hope of helping. This realization is one of the sore discouragements of our century. Jay Forrester has demonstrated it mathematically, with his computer models of cities in which he makes clear that whatever you propose to do, based on common sense, will almost inevitably make matters worse rather than better. You cannot meddle with one part of a complex system from the outside without the almost risk of setting off disastrous more...

EINSTEIN went to the barber for a haircut. As he waited, the physicist contemplated a complex mathematical formula.
When Einstein's turn came, the barber asked the scientist to remove his hat.
'Sorry Einstein mused.' I didn't know ladies were present.'

Private Milton went to psychiatrist and complained: "I have an inferiority complex."

"Nothing I can do for you", said the doc.

"In the Army privates don't have an inferiority complex... they're just inferior..."



An old man saw a very tired infantryman resting after a hard foot march. The man said with disdain: "When I was of your age I thought nothing of a ten-mile hike."

"Well, I don't think much of it either," replied the GI.

A man walked into the office of an eminent psychiatrist and sat down to explain his problem."Doctor, doctor! I've got this problem," the man said. "I keep hallucinating that I'm a dog. It's crazy. I don't know what to do!""A common canine complex," said the doctor soothingly. "Relax. Come here and lie down on the couch.""Oh no, Doctor," the man said nervously, "I'm not allowed up on the furniture."

"First and above all he was a logician. At least thirty-five years of the half-century or so of his existence had been devoted exclusively to proving that two and two always equal four, except in unusual cases, where they equal three or five, as the case may be." -- Jacques Futrelle, "The Problem of Cell 13"Most mathematicians are familiar with -- or have at least seen references in the literature to -- the equation 2 + 2 = 4. However, the less well known equation 2 + 2 = 5 also has a rich, complex history behind it. Like any other complex quantitiy, this history has a real part and an imaginary part; we shall deal exclusively with the latter here. Many cultures, in their early mathematical development, discovered the equation 2 + 2 = 5. For example, consider the Bolb tribe, descended from the Incas of South America. The Bolbs counted by tying knots in ropes. They quickly realized that when a 2-knot rope is put together with another 2-knot rope, a 5-knot rope more...

George Bush rejected a plea from Israel last year to help it raid Iran's main nuclear complex. However, he said he would have supported a raid on Iran's "nucular" complex.