Communism Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Cows In Government

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    FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
    PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you as much milk they think you need.
    BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.
    FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.
    PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbours help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
    RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.
    CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The more...

    Communism is like prohibition - it's a good idea, but it won't work.

    DEFINING SOCIETIES VIA THE OWNERSHIP OF 2 COWS
    FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
    PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.
    BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and as many eggs as the regulations say you should need.
    FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.
    PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.
    RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the more...

    DEFINING SOCIETIES VIA THE OWNERSHIP OF 2 COWSFEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.PURE SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and as many eggs as the regulations say you should need.FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.RUSSIAN COMMUNISM: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.DICTATORSHIP: You have two more...

    Feudalism
    You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.
    Pure Socialism
    You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with
    everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government
    gives you a glass of milk.
    Bureaucratic Socialism
    Your cows are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the
    chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives
    you as much milk and eggs the regulations say you should need.
    Fascism
    You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of
    them, and sells you the milk.
    Pure Communism
    You share two cows with your neighbors. You and your neighbors bicker about
    who has the most "ability" and who has the most "need". Meanwhile, no one
    works, no one gets any milk, and the cows drop dead of starvation.
    Russian Communism
    You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but more...

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