Colours Jokes / Recent Jokes

You`ve been in graphics too long if...
by Chris Thornborrow

Most of your friends can pronounce Gouraud first time. When you fist heard that some people used 16 million colours you wondered whatever for and continued to write colour-map tables for correct highlights on objects. You remember comp. graphics when there weren`t enough articles for you to read, none of them included the word PC and nobody ever asked the difference between raytracing and rendering. You insist that DOOM does not use raycasting. (Technically, as it was first introduced, and anyway, who plays games at your age?) Your partner knows the difference between scientific visualisation and photorealistic rendering, even though they wouldn`t know a polygon from a camel. You think an SGI Indy is OK for a quick hack but not a real graphics machine. You remember discussing how one day there would be graphics hardware to support rendering in desktop machines and people laughed. You watched the Last more...

On a crowded tram going to the football game the fan resplendent in black and white colours had a large magpie tucked under his arm.
Sitting directly opposite, at face level with the magpie, was an old codger flaunting a scarf in the opposing team's colours. "They won't let you take a pig into the ground ya know," he said loudly
"It's not a pig, it's a magpie ya dick head," said the fan in the black and white scarf.
"I wasn't talking to you," said the old codger.