Circled Jokes

A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note: "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."

A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. So he put a note under the windshield wiper that read:

"I have circled the block 100 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. FORGIVE US OUR TRESPASSES."

When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note.

"I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. LEAD US NOT INTO TEMPTATION."

A driver tucked this note under the windshield wiper of his automobile. "Ive circled the block for 20 minutes. Im late for an appointment, and if I dont park here Ill lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses." When he came back he found a parking ticket and this note: "Ive circled the block for 20 years, and if I dont give you a ticket, Ill lose my job. Lead us not into temptation."

A driver tucked this note under the windshield wiper of his automobile. "I've circled the block for 20 minutes. I'm late for an appointment, and if I don't park here I'll lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses."

When he came back he found a parking ticket and this note: "I've circled the block for 20 years, and if I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation."

After four years of separation, a man and his wife finally divorced amicably. He wanted to date again, but he had no idea of how to start, so he decided to look in the personals column of the local newspaper.
After reading through all the listings, he circled three that seemed possible in terms of age and interest, but he put off calling them.
Two days later, there was a message on his answering machine from his ex-wife:
"I came over to your house to borrow some tools today and saw the ads you circled in the paper. Don't call the one in the second column. It's me."