# Chevy Jokes

## L.A. Math Test

File description: This high school math exam gives you insight into life in a crime-filled society.
City of Los Angeles
High School Math Proficiency Exam
Name:____________________
Gang:________________________
1. Duane has an AK47 with a 30 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive by shooting, how many drive by shootings can he attempt before he has to reload?
2. If Jose has two ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8 ball to Jackson for \$320 and 2 grams to Billy for \$85 per gram, what is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?
3. Rufus is pimping for three girls. If the price is \$65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can pay for his \$800 per day crack habit?
4. Jarome wants to cut his 1/2 pound of Heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need?
5. Willie gets \$200 for stealing a BMW, \$50 for a Chevy and \$100 for a 4x4. If he has more...

## Truly stupid people 02

Top honors for "Human Projectile of the Month" go to an as-of-yet unidentified dude who is also a serious contender for the annual "Darwin Award". That prestigious prize is given posthumously to the person who does the human gene pool the greatest service by removing himself from it in the most extraordinarily stupid fashion. Troopers from the Arizona Highway Patrol got on to this gallant if not brainless form of ballistic research after motorists reported some mysterious scorched and blackened scars on a stretch of deserted highway. The more officers found, the stranger the case got. Here is what they "pieced" together: JATO units are basically huge canisters of solid rocket fuel used to achieve "Jet Assisted Take Off", typically lifting big transport planes into the air from short, rough ground runways, or shooting overloaded planes from the decks of aircraft carriers. They were not, repeat NOT, designed to augment the inherent boost factor of more...

## Chevy Nova Award

These are the nominees for the Chevy Nova Award. This is given in honor of the GM's fiasco in trying to market this car in Central and South America. "No va" means, in Spanish, "No go."1. The Dairy Association's huge success with the campaign "Got Milk?" prompted them to expand advertising to Mexico. It was soon brought to their attention the Spanish translation read "Are you lactating?"2. Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of a notorious adult magazine.3. An American T-shirt maker in Miami printed shirts for the Spanish market which promoted the Pope's visit. Instead of "I saw the Pope" (el Papa), the shirts read "I Saw the Potato" (la papa).4. Pepsi's "Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation" translated into "Pepsi Brings Your Ancestors Back From the Grave" in Chinese.5. The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as "Kekoukela", meaning "Bite the wax tadpole" more...

## What did the Chevy sat to the Ford?

What did the Chevy sat to the Ford?Would you like a tow home?

## L.A. Math Test

City of Los Angeles
High School Math Proficiency ExamName:____________________
Gang:________________________1. Duane has an AK47 with a 30 round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive by shooting, how many drive by shootings can he attempt before he has to reload?2. If Jose has two ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8 ball to Jackson for \$320 and 2 grams to Billy for \$85 per gram, what is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?3. Rufus is pimping for three girls. If the price is \$65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can pay for his \$800 per day crack habit?4. Jarome wants to cut his 1/2 pound of Heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need?5. Willie gets \$200 for stealing a BMW, \$50 for a Chevy and \$100 for a 4x4. If he has stolen 2 BMW's and 3 4x4's, how many Chevy's will he have to steal to make \$800?6. Raoul is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got more...