Buddy Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Redneck Joke

    Hot 5 years ago

    There was a Mississippi redneck and a Louisiana Cajun, fishing on their respective sides of the Mississippi river.
    Just as soon as the redneck put his line in the water, he slung a fish onto the bank, and the Cajun was catching nothing, so he yelled across to the redneck, "Buddy, I'd sure like to be on your side of the river!"
    "Aight, tell ya whut, I'll shine my flashlight 'cross this river, and you can walk across this little beam of light!" the redneck yelled back.
    The Cajun replied, "Hain't no way, buddy. I know you think I'm a fool! When I get halfway 'cross, you'll turn your flashlight off!"

    (where "pppphhhhhbbbttttt" equals sticking you tongue between your
    lips and blowing air. A pseudo Bronx cheer.)
    A man walks into a bar with a Leprechaun on his shoulder. He walks
    up the the bar and sets on down. He proceeds to order a beer for
    himself and for the little Leprechaun.
    Well, the guy and the Leprechaun drink about two beers when finally
    the Leprechaun jumps down off the guy's shoulder, trots down the bar
    and stands in front of a rather large construction worker. He looks
    at the construction worker and goes, "ppphhhbbbttttttt" right to the
    big guy's face.
    Well the Leprechaun trots on back on hops back onto his buddy's shoulder.
    The construction worker is a little ticked, but decides to shine on
    this breach of manners.
    After another beer and a half though, the Leprechaun hops down and
    again goes in front of the construction worker and goes, "ppphhhbbbbttt"
    to the more...

    Hairlip paratrooper

    Hot 6 years ago

    Halfway thru bootcamp the hairlip calls home to his buddy. Man this is tough, the drill seargent took three of us way up in a plane.He opened the door and told the first guy JUMP! and the guy did. He grabbed the next guy and said JUMP! and he did.He looked at me and said JUMP! I told him no i just can't. He pulled out his big thang and said, you jump or i'm gonna screw you with this. My goodness said his buddy, did you jump? Well yeah said the hairlip, a little bit right at first.

    T'was the night before Christmas, in Texas, you know.
    Way out on the prairie, without any snow.
    Asleep in their cabin, were Buddy and Sue,
    A dreamin' of Christmas, like me and you.
    Not stockings, but boots, at the foot of their bed,
    For this was Texas, what more need be said,
    When all of a sudden, from out of the still night,
    There came such a ruckus, it gave me a fright.
    And I saw 'cross the prairie, like a shot from a gun,
    A loaded up buckboard, come on at a run,
    The driver was "Geein" and "Hawin", with a will,
    The horses (not reindeer) he drove with such skill.
    "Come on there Buck, Poncho, & Prince, to the right,
    There'll be plenty of travelin' for you all tonight."
    The driver in Levi's and a shirt that was red,
    Had a ten-gallon Stetson on top of his head.
    As he stepped from the buckboard, he was really a sight,
    With his beard and moustache, so curly and white.
    As he burst in the more...

    Leprechauns

    Hot 3 years ago

    One day a man with a box walked in a bar. He sat down, opened the box and out popped a leprechaun. The man told the bartender, "I want a pint of beer and a shot of whiskey for my buddy here."
    There was man sitting at the end of the bar watching all of this and, after the leprechaun drank his shot of whiskey, he ran down to the end of the bar and spit in the guy's face, then he ran back.
    The guy with the box said, "I'll have another beer and a shot of whiskey for my buddy here."
    After the leprechaun drank his shot of whiskey, he again ran to the end of the bar and spit in the man's face, then dashed back.
    The guy with the box ordered another beer for himself and another shot for the leprechaun. Again, after the leprechaun drank his shot of whiskey, he ran down to the end of the bar. But this time the man was waiting for him and he grabbed the leprechaun and held him in the air.
    He said, "If you spit in my face again, I'm going to cut your more...

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