Bored Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm bored!" Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!" Unknown aircraft: "I said I was bored, not stupid!"

    The animals were bored

    Hot 3 weeks ago

    The animals were bored. Finally, the lion had an idea. "I know a really exciting game that the humans play called football. I've seen it on T. V."He proceeded to describe it to the rest of the animals and they all got excited about it so they decided to play. They went out to the field and chose up teams and were ready to begin. The lion's team received. They were able to get two first downs and then had to punt. The mule punted and the rhino was back deep for the kick. He caught the ball, lowered his head and charged. First, he crushed a roadrunner, then two rabbits. He gored a wildebeast, knocked over two cows, and broke through to daylight, scoring six. Unfortunately, they lacked a placekicker, and the score remained 6 - 0. Late in the first half the lion's team scored a touchdown and the mule kicked the extra point. The lion's team led at halftime 7 - 6. In the locker room, the lion gave a peptalk."Look you guys. We can win this game. We've got the lead and they more...

    Bored in a party? Here a list of what you can do:
    Karate chop everywhere and everything. Yell really, really loud. A few sudden kicks would be worthwhile as well.
    Wear wool or feathers and sneeze all night. "The doctor says I'm not allergic to anything except sheep and birds..."
    If someone says the word no to you, say, "How dare you turn down the prince / princess of Ugranialo!"
    Burst into the room an hour late, sopping wet and screaming, "I've done it! I've found Atlantis!"
    Pick out the oldest women at the party, run up to her, and exclaim, "Grandmother! it's me, Anastasia!"
    If it is a summer party in the evening, break into a duet with another guest: "Summer nights". Persuade the host to sing "You're the one that I want" with you.
    Come in saying, the guy outside in the lab coat is looking for (insert name of host).
    How to entertain yourself when stuck in a boring party:
    Speak in more...

    A blonde and her boyfriend were setting at home one night and became bored.
    "Hey, let's play a game" she said."What game?" was his bored reply.
    "Let's play hide'n'seek. I'll give you a blow-job if you can find me."
    "What if I can't find you?"
    "I'll be behind the piano."

    A bored woman says to her husband as she clasps her hands together, "Guess what I have in here and you'll get some loving tonite." The equally bored husband, wishing to avoid any kind of sex at all replies, "An elephant". The wife sez "That's close enough!"

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