Bollywood Jokes

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    Salman Joke

    Hot 4 years ago

    Aamir Khan, Vivek Oberoi and Salman Khan die together in an accident and go
    to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here
    in heaven: Don`t step on the ducks!"
    So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place.
    It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their
    best to avoid them, Aamir accidentally steps on one. Along comes St. Peter
    with the ugliest woman he has ever seen. St. Peter chains them together
    and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity
    chained to the ugly woman!"
    The next day, Vivek Uberoi steps accidentally on a duck, and along comes St. Peter, who doesn`t miss a thing, and with him is another extremely ugly woman. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for Aamir Khan.
    Salman has observed all this and not wanting to be chained for all
    eternity to an ugly woman, is very, VERY more...

    One cannot achieve succeess with every film. Audiences can
    be unpredictable. The failure could be due to a bad script
    or characterisation. All this is a part of the learning process.

    - Amitabh Bachchan (Actor, Producer)


    I refuse to be a doormat to any man. I will never allow
    anyone to push me around. I am my own mistress.
    - Manisha Koirala (Actress)



    Why should I try to imitate Kajol? I am not a
    mimicry artist.
    - Rani Mukherjee (Actress)


    It's strange that Rakesh Roshan thinks I look older than Hrithik.
    In fact, he's approached me for all his home productions.
    - Aishwarya Rai (Actress)


    Just because I'm an actress, why should anyone dare to
    assume that I have no morals?
    - Preity Zinta (Actress)


    I still have a long way to go. People will realise the difference
    between Shah Rukh Khan and a one-movie-wonder like me.
    - Hrithik more...

    After a great success of Aishwarya Rai's movie Bride & Prejudice all over the world, Indian government wanted a special postage stamp with her picture on it to recognize her. Government stress that it should be world class. The stamps were released, and Indian Government & Aishwarya Rai both were pleased.

    But within a couple of days, began hearing complaints that the stamp was not sticking properly, and became furious. Indian Government ordered CBI to investigate the matter.

    CBI checked out at several post offices, and then reported to the Government Officials that: "The stamp is really world class. The problem is, all the peoples are licking on the wrong side of the stamp."

    Dharmendra as Governor

    Hot 4 years ago

    WHY not make Dharmendra the Governor of Tamil Nadu in place of Chenna?

    He would be definitely more acceptable to the barelegged heroine of Izzat movie in which both gave very good performance. Moreover now Dharmendra has experience too in handling the Tamilian superstars which Chenna lacked and failed.

    There was this case in the hospital`s Intensive care ward where patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11a. m, regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM. So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents.
    So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a. m., all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects to ward off evil........ Just when the clock struck 11... Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner! !

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