Bobbitt Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Bobbitt Differences

    Hot 1 year ago

    What's the difference between John and Lorena Bobbitt?
    She's crazy and he's just nuts!

    In a recent Channel 4 news broadcast, it was announced that Lorena Bobbitt's sister Louella was arrested for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal, however, that the sister was not as skilled with a blade as Lorena.
    She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper
    thigh, causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to
    be in serious, but stable condition, and Louella has been charged with... a Misdeweiner!

    Ballad of the Bobbitt Hillbillies! Sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies:
    Here's a little story of a man named John A poor ex-marine with a little fraction gone It seems one night after gettin' with the wife She lopped off his schlong with a swipe of a knife Pecker that is, Rodeoed, fillet food
    Well, the next thing you know there's a ginsu by his side And Lorena's in the car taking willie for a ride She soon got tired of her purple headed friend And tossed him out the window as she rounded the bend Curve, that is Pricker shrubs, wheel hubs
    She went to the cops and confessed to the attack And they called out the hounds just to get his weenie back They sniffed and they barked, then they pointed "over there" To John Wayne's henry that was wavin' in the air Found, that is By a fence, evidence
    Now peter and John couldn't stay apart too long So a d***-doc said "Hey, I can fix your d**g!" A needle and a thread's just the thing you're gonna need Then more...

    Ballad of the Bobbitt Hillbillies! Sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies:Here's a little story of a man named John A poor ex-marine with a little fraction gone It seems one night after gettin' with the wife She lopped off his schlong with a swipe of a knife Pecker that is, Rodeoed, fillet foodWell, the next thing you know there's a ginsu by his side And Lorena's in the car taking willie for a ride She soon got tired of her purple headed friend And tossed him out the window as she rounded the bend Curve, that is Pricker shrubs, wheel hubsShe went to the cops and confessed to the attack And they called out the hounds just to get his weenie back They sniffed and they barked, then they pointed "over there" To John Wayne's henry that was wavin' in the air Found, that is By a fence, evidenceNow peter and John couldn't stay apart too long So a d***-doc said "Hey, I can fix your d**g!" A needle and a thread's just the thing you're gonna need Then the world held it's more...

    John Wayne Bobbitt was in the middle of testifying when he turned to the judge and asked, "Your Honor, could I have a ten minute recess?"
    The judge asked, "Why"?
    Bobbitt replied, "I have to use exhibit A."

  • Recent Activity