Bladder Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    A man goes to the doctor's office and says, "Doc, I'm having a hard time controlling my bladder."

    The doctor says, "Get off my new carpet."

    Why Men Oversleep

    Hot 9 months ago

    BRAIN - SYSTEM: Attention. Alert registered.
    CENTRAL: Alert? Number One, report!
    NUMBER ONE: Sir! We're picking up loud music.
    CENTRAL: Music? We were just asleep!
    NUMBER ONE: Yes sir. Ears report it's "The Last Train to Clarksville."
    CENTRAL: Good lord, are we being tortured?
    NUMBER ONE: Sir, Eyes are functional and request instruction.
    CENTRAL: Tell them to open up and try to find out what is going on.
    NUMBER ONE: Scope! Okay, I see darkness... darkness... Wait, there's a
    woman sleeping there.
    CENTRAL: A woman?
    NUMBER ONE: Sir, Libido Station wants to know if it is Anna Kournikova.
    CENTRAL: Forget about Libido. What can you tell me?
    NUMBER ONE: Sir, Memory reports a near perfect match to "wife," sir.
    CENTRAL: Well of course. Keep looking.
    NUMBER ONE: Sir, urgent report from Stomach on the horn, do you want to take it?
    CENTRAL: Stomach, what's going on?
    STOMACH: Sir, we've taken a more...

    Santa Applied to a medical college But he never made it because, these were his Answers:

    Antibody:
    One who hates his body

    Artery:
    Study of fine paintings

    Bacteria:
    Back door of a cafeteria

    Coma:
    Punctuation Mark

    Gall Bladder:
    Bladder of a girl

    Genes:
    Blue Denim

    Labour pain:
    Hurt at work

    Absent Minded: Opens his vest, pulls out his tie, and pisses in his pants. Clever: Uses no hands, shows off by fixing tie with both hands, looks around for admiration, and sometimes ends up pissing on the floor and onto his shoes. Cross-eyed: Looks into urinal on the left, pisses into the one in the center, and flushes the one on the right. Desperate: Waits in a long time, teeth floating and feet shuffling. Starts to piss as he walks up to urinal but before he can unzip himself. Lets out a long groan and grunt as he finally gets to relieve himself. Disgruntled: Stands for a while, grunts, gives up, and walks away. Drunk: Holds left thumb in right hand and pisses into his pants. Easily induced: Any thought, mention, sight, or slosh of a liquid, from sipping coffee to a runny nose, causes bladder to immediately signal full condition. Efficient: Waits until he has to crap, then does both at once. Erect: Either because his bladder is full or he just saw a sexy woman, his penis is so erect more...

    Absent Minded: Opens his vest, pulls out his tie, and pisses in his pants.Clever: Uses no hands, shows off by fixing tie with both hands, looks around for admiration, and sometimes ends up pissing on the floor and onto his shoes.Cross-eyed: Looks into urinal on the left, pisses into the one in the center, and flushes the one on the right.Desperate: Waits in a long time, teeth floating and feet shuffling. Starts to piss as he walks up to urinal but before he can unzip himself. Lets out a long groan and grunt as he finally gets to relieve himself.Disgruntled: Stands for a while, grunts, gives up, and walks away.Drunk: Holds left thumb in right hand and pisses into his pants.Easily induced: Any thought, mention, sight, or slosh of a liquid, from sipping coffee to a runny nose, causes bladder to immediately signal full condition.Efficient: Waits until he has to crap, then does both at once.Erect: Either because his bladder is full or he just saw a sexy woman, his penis is so erect that he more...

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