Obesity has been getting a lot of bad press recently. Research conducted entirely by thin people, has uncovered justification for their own masochistic obsessive-compulsive, fun-killing anal retentative lifestyles.One of the great problems with research, of course, is that the researchers tend to find what they're looking for. And when they find it, they stop looking for other things. It's important, therefore, not to believe research by pressure groups that start with preconceived ideas.Examples of findings not to believe: research on the benefits of exercise by phys. Ed. Department, on the hazards of cholesterol by an anorexic and on the joy of obesity by an overweight G. P. The whole obesity phobia was started by some statistics from a life insurance company purporting to show that people who were overweight didn't live as long as people who were underweight. These were very raw figures and led to some unwarranted conclusions.First, it was assumed that if the overweight group lost more...
George W. Bush
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Ave., NW
Washington, D.C. 20500
Past Work Experience
Ran for congress and lost.
Produced a Hollywood slasher B movie.
Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas; company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.
With father's help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.
Accomplishments in Previous Positions
Changed pollution laws for power and oil companies and made Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
Replaced Los Angeles with Houston as the most smog-ridden city in America. Cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas government to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
Set record for most executions by any governor in American history.
Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 more...
Having just graduated, the young Engineer was nearing the end of a job interview when the person from Human Resources asked him what salary he would be expecting.
Depending on the benefits package, I'd say in the neighborhood of $100,000 a year," the Engineer replied.
"What would you say to a benefits package of 6 weeks vacation,14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say perhaps a red Porche?" asked the person from HR.
"Wow!!! You've got to be kidding," said the wide-eyed Engineer.
"I certainly am, but you started it!" replied the HR person.
Reaching the end of the job interview, the interviewer asked the young MBA fresh out of MIT, "And what starting salary were you looking for?"
The candidate responded confidently, "In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package,"
The HR person said,"Well, what would you say to a benefits package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two year - say a red Corvette?"
The graduate sat up, mouth agape and said, "Wow! Are you kidding?"
And the interviewer responded,"Of course... but you started it !"
Top 10 Benefits of a White House Internship
First-hand knowledge of domestic affairs
Pay is lousy, but the hush money is great
Gives new meaning to MTV slogan ''Rock the Vote''
Observe the President's commitment to young people
Learn intricacies of statutory rape law
Have President chase around desk brandishing his
President tells you he really wants you on his staff
Try out JFK's legendary rocking chair
Have President introduce you to his 'special
Find out what a politician means when he says he's
been polling his constituents