A man had just got to his hotel room with his newlywed wife on thier honeymoon. He said, "Let's screw." So they took off their clothes and got close and started kissing and the man said, "Wait, we don't have a condom, I'm not ready for kids yet." So the man called up the bellhop and asked him to bring up a condom. When the bellhop got their he said, "Here is your condom sir, would you like me to put it on your bill?"
Two men were quite drunk after attending a company party and wanted to leave the hotel, but they had no idea which way to go.
FInally, they spotted a bellhop. "Hey, buddy," John slurred, "how the heck do we get outta here?"
The bellhop pointed down the hallway and said, "Turn left at the next passage, go down two steps and you'll be in the main lobby."
They stumbled along together, but turned right and fell down the elevator shaft right to the basement.
Moaning and groaning, Larry slowly rolled over and said, "John, if that guy thinks I'm going down the other step, he's crazy"!
One time I went to a hotel. I asked the bellhop to handle my bag. He felt up my wife!
As he checked out of the Hillbilly Hotel, the man suddenly realized he had forgotten his luggage. Turning to the world's slowest bellhop, he shouted, "Run up to room 843 and see if I left my suitcase there."
"Sure thing," drawled the bellhop who started moving slowly towards the elevator.
"Hurry!" the man pleaded. "My plane leaves in ten minutes."
"Whatever you say," said the bellhop, then he disappeared.
Five minutes later the clerk returned, out of breath, and empty-handed.
"Well?" said the man desperately. "Did I leave my suitcase there?"
"Yep, " replied the bellhop happily. "You left it on the bed."