Bad Jokes / Recent Jokes
This old lady was complaining to her friend about a little problem she had with vaginal itch. Her friend suggested that maybe she had an STD. The old lady replied "that's impossible because I am a virgin". To solve the problem the old lady went to the doctor for check up. After the exam the doctor said: " I have good news and bad news, the good news is that you are clean of all STD'S. The bad news is that you have fruit flies because your cherry is rotten"
Bad Light: what games tend to finish in, when it is probably twice as dark as it was when the batsman went off for bad light in the middle of the afternoon session.
Bits and Pieces Player: cricketer who is only average at more things than the average player.
Bowler's Limitation: maximum number of overs a bowler is allowed to bowl, which they usually exceed by bowling no-balls.
Bowler Tossing The Ball Up: bowler celebrating a caught and bowled.
Bowling Attack: a series of bowlers who defend.
Building A Platform For The Innings: method by which batsmen bat very slowly leaving the tail to bat very quickly to ensure a decent total.
Coloured Clothing: what players wear in the hope that spectators will wear it too; also a useful way for the crowd to tell the difference between the batsmen and the bowlers.
Day/Night Match: one-day game played under contemporary over- rates.
Death: part of the innings in more...
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
Aries
The Ram. Their farts are "Built Ram Tough". They may feel like Curly-Qs coming out of their asses because their farts mimic the curves of a ram's horns. They, the farts, sometimes like to butt heads with other farts. Since people born under the sign of Aries show strong leadership and like to get things started, they are always the first ones to fart while around other people. Their farts tend to be loud since they are energetic. Do you like to hear robust farts? Too shy to be the first one to fart? Get with an Aries.
Taurus
The Bull. Their farts can be very stubborn, and once released, they can stink up a space with power for very long periods of time-longer than average. Their farts just don't want to go away. Their farts can even be kinda sharp and hurt their *******s when they come out, because they are big and mimic the sharp horns of the bull. Since Taurus people love sensual pleasures, they must take care not to over-indulge and more...
Editor's Note: Not really all humor, unless you consider grown men in tights slapping each others asses funny...
#1. Seen on a church sign in Arkansas prior to the 1969 game.
' Football is only a game.
Spiritual things are eternal.
Nevertheless, Beat Texas'
#2.' After you retire from football, there's only one big event left... and I ain't ready for that.' Bobby Bowden / Florida State
#3.' The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely to be the one who dropped it.' Lou Holtz / Arkansas
#4.' When you win, nothing hurts.' Joe Namath / Alabama
#5.' Motivation is simple. You eliminate those who are not motivated.' Lou Holtz / Arkansas
#6.' If you want to walk the heavenly streets of gold, you gotta know the password,' Roll, tide, roll!' Bear Bryant / Alabama
#7.' A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.' Frank Leahy / Notre more...
A Mississippi professor was at a party and became indignant when asked if college professors were absent-minded. "Professors havent got bad memories," he declared. "Theyre not absent-minded. Dont you think I know where I am right now, and dont you think tomorrow Ill know where I was last night? Would somebody like to ask me another question?" "Yes," said another guest. "Is it true that professors are absent-minded and have bad memories?" "Good!" said the professor. "I knew sooner or later somebody would ask me that question."