Anchor Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The Storm

    Hot 2 years ago

    A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea captain.
    "What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?"
    "Throw out an anchor, sir," the student replied.
    "What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?"
    "Throw out another anchor, sir."
    "And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do then?" asked the captain.
    "Throw out another anchor, sir."
    "Hold on," said the captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors from?"
    "From the same place you're getting your storms, sir."

    This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for two days and a very
    embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she
    speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any...?
    There was this female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have
    snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked, "So Bob, where's that 8
    inches you promised me last night?"
    Not only did he have to leave the set, but half the crew did too because they
    were laughing so hard!

    Banjo Joke

    Hot 4 years ago

    Q: How many banjo players does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one, but all the others gathered around will complain that that's not the way Earl Scruggs would have done it.Q: How can you tell the stage you're playing on is level? A: The banjo player is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.Q: What is the difference between a banjo and an anchor? A: You tie a rope to an anchor before you throw it overboard.Q: Why do so many fishermen own banjos? A: They make great anchors! Q: Why did the Boy Scout take up the banjo? A: They make good paddles.Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a chain saw? A: A chain saw has a dynamic range.Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a chain saw? A: You can turn off a chainsaw.Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a South American Macaw? A: One is loud, obnoxious and noisy; the other is a bird.Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a Harley-Davidson motorcycle? A: You can tune a Harley.Q: What is the difference more...

    A young naval student was being put through the paces by an old sea captain. "What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard?" "Throw out an anchor, sir," the student replied. "What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?" "Throw out another anchor, sir." "And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do then?" asked the captain. "Throw out another anchor, sir." "Hold on," said the captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors from?" "From the same place you're getting your storms, sir."

    The grizzled old sea captain was quizzing a young, tyro naval student.
    "What steps would you take if a sudden storm came up on the starboard?"
    "I'd throw out an anchor, sir."
    "What would you do if another storm sprang up aft?"
    "I'd throw out another anchor, sir."
    "But what if a third storm sprang up forward?"
    "I'd throw out another anchor, captain."
    "Just a minute, son. Where in the world are you getting all these
    anchors?"
    "From the same place you're getting all your storms, sir."
    (Now, that's a BRAVE sailor....)

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